Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is undeniable that looks plays a vital role in the human life. In current time it is a convenient for individuals to buy various products or do treatments for showing themselves younger than their real age. From my perspective, this is a negative trend as it creates many health related issues.

To embark with issue in concern, in todays era many people spend their savings on skins care products. By using this creame or gel they try to hide mark on their body. In fact such products are easily available not only in store but also via online. Additionally, owing to the advancement in the technology, medical science at top notch for serving quality treatments. Therefore, many people go under operation for looking more younger. To quote an instance, Rakhi Shawant a famous bollywood actor went under many face surgeries to look beautiful in the film industry.

According to my view, this trend has many drawbacks such as temporary happiness, serious health related problems and waste of money. To elaborate, although it has many dangerous sideeffects, many people spend lots of money for beauty treatment and for skincare products. For example, for a make up kit, individuals pay more and it gives them happiness for certain time. A core reason of skin allergy is low quality or inappropriate item of make up. In addition to that many times due to the wrong products people can face serious health problem such as skin cancer.

To conclude, even though it is easy to access skin products and possible to pay for having good look, people should avoid such risk. From my opinion it is a negative trend because it has many disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction to the conclusion: you consider the trend negative because of health risks and financial waste. You address both the availability of products and treatments and give relevant examples, including cosmetic surgery and makeup-related skin problems. However, the discussion is uneven. The surgery example is named but not explained in terms of its risks, while the point about temporary happiness is only briefly stated. The claim that unsuitable makeup can cause skin cancer also needs careful support or a more precise example. To strengthen the response, develop each main reason with a clear explanation of how it affects people, and ensure examples directly support the specific point being made.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. The reader can follow the shift from describing products and treatments to explaining why you see them as harmful. Linking expressions such as “Additionally,” “To elaborate,” and “To conclude” help signal these stages. At times, however, the progression feels mechanical, and some connections between ideas are not fully clear. For instance, the first body paragraph describes access to skincare and surgery, but does not clearly connect these details to the health-risk argument that follows. The second paragraph also moves quickly from temporary happiness to spending and then to skin conditions. Group related points more deliberately and use clearer references to show how each example supports your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “treatments,” “medical science,” “side effects,” “skin allergy,” and “health related problems.” These choices make your main ideas understandable, and you attempt more specific language when discussing cosmetic procedures and skincare. However, several word choices, collocations and spelling errors reduce precision, such as “skins care products,” “creame,” “hide mark,” and “more younger.” Phrases such as “top notch” and “good look” are also less suitable or natural in this formal essay. Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise terms for cosmetic procedures and possible adverse effects would help you express your ideas with greater control.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and some more complex forms, including “although it has many dangerous sideeffects” and “even though it is easy to access skin products.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the overall meaning is generally clear. Some grammatical errors remain, particularly with subject–verb agreement, articles, plurals and sentence patterns. For example, “looks plays” should be “appearance plays,” and “it is a convenient” needs a different construction, such as “it is convenient.” In “many people go under operation,” the article and phrasing need correction. Review agreement and article use, and practise building complex sentences accurately so that the range you attempt is more consistently controlled.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.