Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 7.0)

Nowadays, many people spend money on products and treatment that will help them to look younger. Although these options will improve individuals appearance and confidence, I believe that this is generally a negative development because it can create unrealistic beauty standards and leads to unnecessary expenses and health risks.

On the one hand, using anti ageing products and treatments will have several health benefits. Many people feel more confident when they are satisfied with their appearance. For instance, skin cream will help to reduce dryness, protect the skin from sun damage and make people look healthier. Similarly, certain cosmetic treatments may help individuals feel more comfortable with their appearance. This can have a positive effect on their social lives and professional confidence. Furthermore, the growing demand of such products has created employment in the healthcare and beauty industry.

On the other hand, I believe the disadvantage are more significant. Firstly, many people become more obsessed with looking young because of the unrealistic beauty standards promoted by social media and advertisement. Secondly, expensive cosmetic products and treatments can put a financial pressure on individuals, particularly when the spend a lot of money just to meet the society's expectations. In addition, some treatments ,may cause side effects if they are performed incorrectly or with out proper doctor's consultation.

In my opinion, people should free to choose how they want to look, provided they understand the potential risks. However society should encourage people to accept natural ageing process. Inconclusion, although anti-ageing products and treatments can improve confidence and appearance, I believe that their negative effects, including financial pressure, health risks and unrealistic beauty expectations outweigh their benefits.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response7.0
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.5
Overall7.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you acknowledge benefits but judge the overall trend negatively, and you return to this view in the conclusion. You address both sides with relevant points, including confidence, employment, unrealistic beauty standards, cost and possible health risks. The examples about skin cream and cosmetic treatments help explain the benefits, while the discussion of social media and financial pressure supports your main argument. This fits a response that covers the task and extends its ideas. To develop the argument further, explain the consequences of key points more specifically—for example, how repeated spending can affect household finances, or what kinds of risks arise from particular treatments. Some claims, such as the employment benefit, are mentioned but not explored.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 7.0

The response has a clear overall progression: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs contrast benefits and drawbacks, and the conclusion restates your judgement. Paragraphing is appropriate, and signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In addition” make the relationships between points easy to follow. The argument also moves logically from personal confidence to wider social and financial concerns. To make cohesion more flexible and polished, avoid relying mainly on explicit sequencing words such as “Firstly” and “Secondly”; connect some ideas through clearer cause-and-effect links. For instance, explain directly how social-media ideals can lead people to spend more on treatments. A few transitions, especially the shift from individual benefits to employment, could also be made more gradual.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a suitable range of topic vocabulary, including “unrealistic beauty standards,” “cosmetic treatments,” “side effects,” and “natural ageing process.” These phrases communicate the main ideas clearly, and the vocabulary is generally appropriate to the task. There is also some variety in how you describe the effects, such as “confidence,” “financial pressure,” and “health risks.” However, several word-choice and collocation errors reduce precision: “the growing demand of” should be “demand for,” “put a financial pressure” is more naturally “place financial pressure,” and “advertisement” should be plural or replaced with “advertising” in this context. Check spelling and spacing as well, including “anti-ageing” and “without.” More accurate collocations and consistent spelling would make your vocabulary more controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You use a mix of simple and complex structures, including a concessive opening (“Although these options…”), a conditional clause (“if they are performed incorrectly”), and a concluding clause beginning “provided they understand…”. These structures help you express contrast and qualification, and the meaning remains clear. Some grammatical errors persist, however. In “individuals appearance,” the possessive form is needed; “the disadvantage are” has a subject–verb agreement error; and “people should free to choose” needs “be.” There are also article and number issues in phrases such as “natural ageing process.” Punctuation around the comma in “some treatments ,may” needs correction. Review agreement, possessives, and missing verbs, then proofread punctuation to improve accuracy while retaining your sentence variety.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.