Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-15
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.
Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Every human wish for looking younger and fit at every age. There is an argument that these days people can spend enough money to purchase certain products or do costly treatments that help them to look younger. I believe that it is a positive thing by looking like a teenager a person feels confident and also helps to work in certain career were looks matter the most.
Firstly, looking younger can fosters various career prospects which also helps to gain name and fame. Working in film industry always demands fresh and stunning face if person spend some earnings to build their overall appereance it will defenitely assist them to get job in cinema. For instance, many celebrities spends cash for facial plastic surgery to look unique and beautiful, doing so they get more role for working in a movie. Secondly, many people are health concious and they always like to buy products which enhance their beauty. To illustrate, people buys certain cosmetics and korean face mask to keep their skin soft and shinny. Therefore, it is a good opportunity that person can pay to buy products which helps them to regain beauty.
However, many beauty products contain harmful chemicals which can be harmful in a longrun. It is found that various items has bad substance that might cause life thretening disease. To exemplify, during lipstick production they use adverse solution which promotes cancer cell production. Although, few goods contain damaging chemicals but customer can always do through research and purchase the product. Any how most stuff are lab tested and qualified so there is no such worry to buy beauty cosmetics.
To conclude, some stock contain harmful chemicls which can cause side effects but pharma industry is well developed. Therefore, spending on products which helps to look younger is a good thing.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
Your position is clear: you consider products and treatments for looking younger a positive development, while acknowledging possible chemical risks. You address both sides and give relevant examples, including appearance-related work in film and cosmetics. However, some support is not fully developed: the claim that a youthful appearance improves career prospects is mainly illustrated through celebrities, and the health-risk point is quickly dismissed rather than weighed against your overall view. The discussion also focuses mostly on products, with less attention to treatments. To strengthen the response, explain how these examples support your judgement and consider the benefits and risks of treatments as well as cosmetics.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting benefits and risks, and a conclusion that restates your position. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “However,” and “To conclude” help readers follow the main stages. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, and links between claims and examples are not always clear. For instance, the discussion moves from film careers to cosmetics without explaining how these points relate to the broader argument. The paragraph beginning “However” raises a concern but then quickly reverses it, making the reasoning feel abrupt. Use clearer references and develop each paragraph around one main point, showing how each example supports it.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use vocabulary relevant to appearance and the topic, including “facial plastic surgery,” “cosmetics,” “harmful chemicals,” and “career prospects.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “life threatening disease.” However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors reduce precision: “appereance,” “defenitely,” “health concious,” and “regain beauty.” Some phrases are also unnatural, including “get more role for working in a movie” and “do through research.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations rather than adding ambitious wording. Learning topic-specific collocations and checking spelling and word forms would make your meaning clearer and more fluent.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and complex sentences, using structures such as “Although few goods contain damaging chemicals…” and “if a person spend some earnings…”. This shows an effort to connect ideas and vary sentence forms. However, errors in agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur often enough to make some sentences difficult to read. For example, “Every human wish” needs a plural subject with a matching verb, while “people buys” and “many celebrities spends” have agreement errors. The opening paragraph also runs several ideas together without clear sentence boundaries. Practise subject–verb agreement, article use, and punctuation, and check that each sentence has a clear main clause. More accurate control of these patterns will help your complex sentences communicate reliably.
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