Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern era people can buy some cosmetics or pay for treatments that make them look younger. In my point of view this thing have negtive effect on human body as it cause health issuse and destory their natural face.

Firstly, this porducts or treatment are putting side effect on health. Because some of this treatment are performed by high raditions which damage the individual other body cells and cause rush as well as swalling. For example, their is one well know celebrate who took the plastic surgery treatment to change her lip but due to some effect her full face become red with lot of swalling which make her unble to come in front of media for one year.

In addition to it, no doubt this product help individual to look younger. However, this will be completely destory their natural beuty of face as this damage their face expression. For instance, some people prefer to put cream and makeup which help them to look younger for some time but it will also make them ugly when they did not put that cosmetic on the face. Consequently, they become adpated to that product.

In conclusion, although, there are some producta and treatment which help people to look younger but there benefits are less as compare to side effect as they people loss their natural face cells and go through some health issuses.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you consider anti-ageing products and treatments harmful, and you give two relevant reasons—possible health effects and damage to natural appearance. The examples about surgery and cosmetics help illustrate these points. However, the discussion is only partly developed: the celebrity example is vague, and the claim that cosmetics make people look ugly without them needs clearer explanation or support. The response also does not meet the required minimum of 250 words; at 233 words, it is 17 words short. Develop each reason with a more specific explanation or a credible example, and ensure the response reaches the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and a conclusion restates your position. Sequencing phrases such as “Firstly,” “In addition to it,” and “In conclusion” make the structure easy to follow. However, some links are mechanical, and the relationship between ideas is occasionally unclear. For example, “Because some of this treatment…” is a sentence fragment, while “However” introduces a contrast that is not fully explained. References such as “this thing” and “this” are also imprecise. Use clearer links between claims and examples, and make sure each paragraph develops one connected line of reasoning.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “cosmetics,” “treatments,” “side effect,” “plastic surgery,” and “natural beauty,” so the main ideas can generally be understood. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less clear, such as “high raditions,” “celebrate,” “swalling,” and “adpated.” Some combinations are also unnatural, including “putting side effect on health” and “natural face cells.” Aim to learn accurate collocations for discussing health and appearance, and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you express your reasons without relying on repeated general terms such as “product” and “treatment.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast with “although” and a relative clause in “which damage the individual other body cells.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “this thing have negative effect” has agreement and article problems, while “their benefits are less” does not form a clear comparison. The sentence beginning “Because” is also incomplete. Practise building accurate sentences with subordinate clauses, and check subject–verb agreement and singular/plural forms before adding more complexity.

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