Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

These days, it becomes easier for individuals to purchase several products or pay for treatments to look younger. I believe that it is a negative trend because this may cause skin related problems and it may result in a financial strain and domestic dispute.

To begin with, to maintain a youthful look, people are paying for medications. This is mainly because it is helpful to tight and glow their skin, and make them look beautiful in this world, as a result, they get attracted towards these brands. However, these products can affect their skin negatively by allergies or make the situation more worse by burning it. For example, in this modern era, many people purchase skincare products which create a harmful effects on their well-being, such as allergies, and skin burning.

Furthermore, buying these beauty formulations encourage consumers to spend more, which increase the financial burden on them, therefore, creates stress and mental pressure. More importantly, families struggle to manage the money, so it leads to family conflicts. For instance, Dermatologist's motivates their customers about the beauty importance, which results in overspending even if they cannot afford it.

In conclusion, it is clear that nowadays people spend more on cosmetics to look younger. I firmly believe that this trend have negative consequences on health, as well as disturb financial management and affect families psychologically.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you consider the trend negative, and the conclusion restates this view. You address the question with two relevant reasons—possible skin harm and financial pressure affecting families—and include examples. However, the health point is repeated in similar terms, while the financial and family-conflict idea is less fully explained; the dermatologist example does not clearly show how this spending causes conflict. The response is also 26 words below the required minimum, so there is limited space to develop your reasoning. Explain the cause-and-effect links more fully and add a specific, relevant example to support each main point.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted by “To begin with” and “Furthermore,” and a conclusion. The reader can follow the progression from health concerns to financial and family effects, and your final paragraph brings the main position together. This meets the expectations for coherent organisation, with some evidence of flexible linking. However, several connections are mechanical or unclear: “as a result” does not clearly show how products make people look beautiful, and “therefore” is awkwardly attached to the financial-burden sentence. The example in the second body paragraph also does not connect explicitly to family conflict. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make the relationship between each claim and its example explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “youthful look,” “skin-related problems,” “financial burden,” and “family conflicts,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “beauty formulations.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “medications” for cosmetic products, “tight and glow their skin,” and “more worse.” “Beauty importance” is also unclear, and “harmful effects” is followed by an awkwardly formed example. These issues make expression less precise and show that less common vocabulary is not yet controlled consistently. Choose familiar, accurate collocations and check whether each word fits its context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a reason clause with “because” and a contrast introduced by “However.” Most of the intended meaning remains understandable, but some errors in agreement, verb forms, and sentence construction reduce accuracy. For example, “buying these beauty formulations encourage” should have a singular verb, while “this trend have” also needs subject–verb agreement. In “it is helpful to tight and glow,” the verb pattern is incorrect, and “therefore, creates stress” lacks a clear grammatical subject. There are also problems with plural forms and punctuation in the dermatologist example. Review agreement and clause structure, then proofread each sentence for a complete subject and verb.

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