Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

These days people use alternatives to look younger such as by using expensive products or treatments. Although, it gives them satisfaction and boost their confidence, it is highly effective for their skin. I will elaborate the reasons along with examples in upcoming paragraphs.

The reason is why people use these products to look younger is that they find it instant solution to solve the problem. Without considering negative impacts of high frequency treatments such as face laser, they prefer beauty. For example, many people suffer from skin cancer which might reduce their life spam. Consequently, It is extremly bad for people to use it. Furthermore, these treatments or products are also expensive to buy. Some people still buy them even their budgets do not allow them. Ultimately, they have to face finacial problems at the end.

Moreover, there are many precautions to follow after the treament, due to which they can not focus on their other tasks such as household duties or healthy activities. For example, some treatments do not allow people to do exercises. This is because excessive sweat can pause the affect of the treament. This might cause many health issues such as obesity. Additionally, it effects other people's social life because some people cannot afford these products and treatment. They compare themselves when they face each other. As a result, they avoid to go in social gathering and prefer to stay home.

In conclusion, according to aformentioned information, many people think that these lotions or treatments brighten up their skin, however, side effects can not be neglected. Not only it is time consuming but also not ideal for financial stability and social life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You take a clear position that the drawbacks of anti-ageing products and treatments outweigh their benefits, and you give several relevant reasons: possible health effects, expense, aftercare restrictions, and social pressure. This addresses the question, with examples such as avoiding exercise after treatment helping to illustrate your points. However, the benefits mentioned in the introduction—satisfaction, confidence, and skin improvement—are not developed, so the discussion is weighted almost entirely toward the negative side. Some claims also need clearer explanation: the link between laser treatments and skin cancer, for instance, is presented as fact without support. Develop both sides briefly and make examples more precise to strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The body paragraphs group related disadvantages, and signposts such as “Furthermore,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, and some links between ideas are unclear. For example, the move from treatment aftercare to obesity, then to other people’s social lives, brings together points that need a clearer connection. “The reason is why” also makes the opening of the first body paragraph difficult to follow. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main point, then explain and support it in a logical sequence; vary linking devices and clarify references such as “it” and “they.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “treatments,” “side effects,” “financial stability,” and “social gathering,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “excessive sweat” and “skin cancer.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “life spam,” “pause the affect,” and “brighten up their skin.” Spelling errors such as “extremly,” “finacial,” and “treament” also reduce precision. Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling carefully; choosing a simpler, accurate phrase is better than using an uncertain expression. This would make your vocabulary more precise and natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession with “Although” and a result clause beginning “This might cause.” Most of the argument remains understandable, but some sentence structures are incomplete or awkward. “Although, it gives them satisfaction and boost their confidence” is not a complete sentence as written, and “The reason is why people use these products… is that” has an unnecessarily tangled structure. There are also errors in agreement and articles, as in “it is highly effective” after plural “products or treatments,” and “they find it instant solution.” Review clause construction, subject–verb agreement, and article use, then proofread punctuation. More consistently accurate complex sentences would improve control.

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