Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is increasingly common today to see consumers purchase products or treatments which might help them look youthful. In my opinion, this is fundamentally a highly negative development. I believe this because it lead to unnoticeable results, and furthermore, it will generate financial burden.

The primary reason to this trend as a negative trend is consumers used uncountable products, and the results still unnoticeable. To explain further, purchasers used different products and treatments but the results still remain unchanged. For example, CY company new invented skincare product to reduced dark circles. But lots of consumers complained the outcome is still remain unchanged, which they had already bought the product couple of times. Consequently, all of these speedings only resulted as self-consolation.

Furthermore, this development is detrimental because it will lead to financial burden. For instance, purchasing a skincare product or a treatment usually cost a lot of money, which created a lot of unnecessary spending. A clear illustration of this is a regular consumer been purchasing such company products for years which accumulated a massive amount of money, but the results remain the same. Therefore, it is evident that this shift creates tons of unnecessary purchases and also created financial burden.

In conclusion, the shift toward will products or treatments make consumers look younger is undoubtedly a negative progression. This is because most of the time skincare products resulted as unnoticeable or remain unchanged, and it ultimately created a lot of unnecessary spendings and all of these just a self-consolation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you regard anti-ageing products and treatments as a negative development, and both body paragraphs give relevant reasons—ineffective results and financial cost. The examples about the skincare product and a regular consumer help illustrate these points, so the response addresses the question. However, the first reason is repeated in several forms (“results still remain unchanged”) rather than developed with a fuller explanation, and the examples are hypothetical and lack detail about why consumers continue buying the products. The financial argument is also asserted more than explored. To strengthen the response, explain the consequences more specifically—for example, how repeated spending affects household budgets—and develop each example with clearer supporting detail.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and a conclusion restates your position. Linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “For instance,” and “Therefore” make the progression easy to follow, and the reader can identify the main point of each paragraph. This meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger organisation. However, cohesion is occasionally mechanical, with repeated references to “results” and “unnecessary” spending, and the conclusion largely repeats earlier wording rather than drawing the argument together. Some references are also unclear, such as “such company products.” Use more varied referencing and connect each example explicitly to the reason it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “treatments,” “financial burden,” “detrimental,” and “consumers,” and your meaning is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are noticeably inaccurate, which can make the reader pause. Examples include “uncountable products,” “self-consolation,” “speedings,” and “the shift toward will products.” There is also repetition of “results,” “unchanged,” and “unnecessary.” Aim for more precise expressions such as “a wide range of products,” “false reassurance,” and “repeated expenditure.” Check that each word fits its context and use a broader set of terms for effectiveness, cost, and appearance.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses with “which” and “because,” and the overall message can usually be followed. However, control is inconsistent: verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction contain frequent errors that sometimes make the meaning difficult to process. For example, “it lead to” should be “it leads to,” “usually cost” should be “usually costs,” and “a regular consumer been purchasing” needs a finite verb, such as “a regular consumer has been purchasing.” The final sentence, “all of these just a self-consolation,” is missing a verb. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and verb, then review tense and agreement, especially in examples and conclusions.

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