Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

These days, an increasing number of people are willing to buy products and are ready to go for the treatment that makes them look younger. Although, people get it done to enhance there beauty but it has a negative impact because it creates unrealistic beauty standards in others mind which can create financial pressure on individual.

On the positive side, using anti ageing products keeps skin healthy and protect it from unwanted pigmentation. Also, such treatments helps in enhancing self-esteem of many people making them feel more confident in a group of young people.Moreover, cosmetic treatments can help individual to improve their appearance if they are not satisfied with the visible ageing lines of any marks. For example- many famous celebrities have gone under surgeries just took look good so that they can get role in movies.

On the negative side, growing obessession with looking younger is making people feel under confident with their natural beauty. It creates financial burden on the middle class family as everybody's pocket does not allow it. Social media influencers are promoting flawless skin which makes individual feel dissatisfied with how they look so they decide to go for fillers, botox and other injections which has a side effect if not done properly.

In my opinion,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You discuss both benefits and drawbacks, and your position begins to emerge through the contrast between improved confidence and the harms of unrealistic standards and cost. However, the response does not fully complete the task: it ends with “In my opinion,” without stating a final judgement, so your overall view remains unclear. Several points are relevant but briefly supported. For instance, you mention celebrities having surgery to obtain movie roles, but do not explain the example’s significance; the concerns about social-media pressure and side effects could also be developed with a specific explanation or example. The response is 39 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop your ideas. Add a clear conclusion and extend your main reasons with relevant support.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph presenting advantages, and a paragraph presenting disadvantages. Signposting such as “On the positive side” and “On the negative side” helps readers follow the change in focus. However, the progression is incomplete because the final line, “In my opinion,” is unfinished and there is no conclusion to bring the argument together. Some links between ideas are also abrupt: the celebrity example follows the point about appearance without clearly showing how it supports the argument. The opening sentence’s “Although” construction is not completed smoothly, and spacing and punctuation around “young people.Moreover” interrupt the flow. Use complete transitions, connect examples explicitly to claims, and finish with a concise summary of your view.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “anti ageing products,” “self-esteem,” “financial burden,” “flawless skin,” “fillers,” and “botox.” These choices make the subject clear and show some ability to use relevant terms beyond basic vocabulary. There are, however, several inaccurate or awkward expressions that reduce precision, such as “under confident,” “visible ageing lines of any marks,” and “gone under surgeries just took look good.” Spelling errors such as “obessession” and “there” also affect the accuracy of word choice. Aim for more natural collocations and check spelling and word forms carefully. For example, describe people as “insecure about their natural appearance” and refer to “ageing lines or marks” rather than the unclear phrase used here.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including a subordinate clause beginning “Although” and a relative clause in “treatments that help them to look younger.” Meaning is generally understandable, but some grammatical errors remain. Subject–verb agreement is inconsistent in “products keeps skin healthy,” “treatments helps,” and “injections which has a side effect.” The opening “Although” clause is left without a properly connected main clause, and “In my opinion,” is an incomplete sentence. There are also problems with articles and sentence boundaries, as in “in a group of young people.Moreover.” Review agreement, complete each clause, and proofread punctuation. More accurate control of these structures would make your argument easier to read.

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