Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays it's possible for people to buy many products or pay for treatments that help them to look younger.

Is this a good thing or a bad thing?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this modern era, looking young and perfect makes a person confident and make their appearance on social media or in society. Whereas, it also has some kind of side effect and not good for skin alongside it is also expensive for most of the people.

On one hand, Applying makeup and having treatment by professionals can make appearance of a person and provide him\her confidence. there are different kind of cosmetics in the market according to person face and thier problems for example, creams for scars and pimples, hair colours, lipstick for daily use and some can be used for special occasions like, eyelashes, blushes and skin care creams for daily routine. along with, this they can also use jewellery like nose pins, neckless, earrings and anklets for feet for girls.

On the other hand, makeup products are not pocket friendly for all some products are really expensive you go for budget friendly creams. it can also make reactions on your skin with having not suitable ingredients for a skin or not applied in correct way. some people prefers skin treatments and it can also cause skin damage if it is not performed by professionals.

using makeup most of time can also drop your confidence as you going prefer makeup on your skin for every occasion and going to depend on the product. you will believe that you need makeup for looking good your own skin is not good.

In conclusion, these beauty products can boost your identity but depending every time on these products are not not good. doing skin care is good thing we all need to do is like using moisturiser and sun scream.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both the benefits and drawbacks of products and treatments intended to improve appearance, and your conclusion gives a broadly balanced view: they can boost confidence, but relying on them is not good. The examples of cosmetics, skin reactions, and professional treatments are relevant. However, the task asks whether this is a good or bad thing, and your position is not fully clear until the conclusion; the opening mainly describes looking young and perfect rather than directly answering the question. Several points, such as jewellery and the list of cosmetics, are not clearly connected to looking younger, while the confidence and skin-damage arguments need fuller explanation or a specific example. State your judgement clearly in the introduction and develop fewer, more directly relevant reasons.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph presenting benefits, a paragraph presenting drawbacks, and a conclusion. The contrast between “On one hand” and “On the other hand” helps readers follow the two sides. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes uneven: the first body paragraph moves from professional treatments to a long list of cosmetics and then jewellery, which weakens the focus. Some links are mechanical or unclear, including “Whereas” at the start of the introduction and “along with, this.” The final paragraph repeats the dependence point without clearly synthesising the two sides. Group related ideas, use linking phrases accurately, and make each paragraph’s main point explicit before adding examples.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “treatments,” “cosmetics,” “skin damage,” “confidence,” and “ingredients,” so the reader can understand the main subject. There are also attempts at more specific examples, such as creams for scars and pimples. However, the range is limited by repetition of “makeup,” “products,” and “skin,” and several choices or combinations are inaccurate or unclear, such as “make appearance,” “drop your confidence,” and “boost your identity.” Spelling errors such as “thier,” “neckless,” and “sun scream” also reduce precision. Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing appearance and self-esteem, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including a conditional idea in “if it is not performed by professionals,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in agreement, sentence boundaries, and clause construction sometimes make the reader work to understand the point. For example, “looking young and perfect makes a person confident and make their appearance” has faulty agreement and an unclear second clause; “there are different kind of cosmetics” also has a number-agreement error. Several sentences begin with lowercase letters after full stops, and the opening “Whereas” clause is not joined correctly. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and complete sentence construction, then proofread punctuation and capitalisation.

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