Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is very common in the world that overconsume rate of clothes are increasing day by day . This essay will examine some causes behind this ongoing trend as well as some possible solutions to overcome this issue .

Firstly , the main reason behind this is populatrity of brands . There are different types of brands in each areas which encourage people to buy . Sometimes there are speacial discount like buy one get one second 50% off . So , public purchase new garments to enhance their collections . Secondly , indiviuals buy new attiers for publicity . Most of the upper class citizen do not like to repeat their clothes . This can be seen as a example of social media influencer . They always wear new collection on daily basis which lead to buy uncessary clothes .

However , there are many some solutions to overcome this problem . Government should keep awareness toward brand promoting. As society watch any brand promotion on internet . They decided to buy because of attraction towards new article . If this thing can be reduced . it would be easy to handle the situation of overuse . Additionally , there should be no discount offer on shops which stops young genrations to get benefits . To add it more , there is mandatory in every offices like banks , hospitals and in education insitutes to follow a dress code . It automatically reduce the overuse collection of employess .

To conclude it more . Eventhough, its become a trend to purchase more clothes , i believe that there are many possible ways such as dress code , no offer which can aware the public to negetive effects of overuse material .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both questions: it identifies brand popularity, promotional discounts and pressure to appear fashionable as reasons, then proposes limiting promotions and introducing workplace dress codes. These ideas are relevant, and the conclusion restates the view that action can reduce excessive buying. However, some points are only partly explained. For example, the link between influencers wearing new collections and ordinary people buying more could be developed with a clearer explanation of social pressure or imitation. The proposed restrictions on advertising and discounts also need more justification, including how they would persuade consumers rather than simply limit their choices. Overall, the main parts of the task are covered, but the support and explanation are uneven; develop each cause and solution with a specific consequence or example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on solutions and a conclusion. Sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “However” and “Additionally” help readers follow the main stages. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical, and some links between sentences are unclear. For instance, “If this thing can be reduced” does not specify whether it refers to brand promotion or consumers’ exposure to it, while “To add it more” is an awkward transition. The conclusion also begins with “To conclude it more,” which does not form a natural link. Use fewer formulaic connectors and make references explicit; organise each body paragraph around one main point, followed by its explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses relevant topic vocabulary, including “discount,” “brand promotion,” “social media influencer,” “dress code” and “overuse.” This gives the reader a basic understanding of the subject. However, the range and control are limited, with repeated general words such as “buy,” “clothes” and “problem,” and several inaccurate or misspelled expressions. Examples include “overconsume rate,” “new attiers,” “uncessary clothes” and “overuse collection.” Some phrases, such as “awareness toward brand promoting,” are difficult to interpret because the word choice and collocation are unnatural. Build a more precise vocabulary for consumer behaviour and fashion, and check spelling and word forms carefully. More accurate phrasing would make the ideas clearer and more persuasive.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

There is an attempt to use both simple and more complex sentences, including “Sometimes there are…” and the conditional “If this thing can be reduced…”. The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but grammatical control is inconsistent. Examples include “overconsume rate … are increasing,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “Most of the upper class citizen,” where the plural form is needed. Articles and sentence boundaries also cause problems, as in “as a example” and “If this thing can be reduced . it would be easy…”. Several sentences rely on basic patterns, while attempted longer constructions are not always controlled. Practise subject–verb agreement, articles, plural forms and punctuation, then check that each sentence has a complete, clearly connected structure.

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