Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

It is often argued that, nowadays people buy too many clothes.There are many reasons for this, like some people have shopping habits,many folks like to wear new clothes at every occasions to show their status, and online shopping. Few things can help to persuade people to buy less clothes like the habit to repeat clothes by seeing famous faces and by limiting the fashion advertisements.

There are numerous reasons, why people do too much clothing shopping, First and foremost, due to the shopping habits. Some people when they feel happy or stressed they do shopping. This is their way to overcome the emotions and feel the sence of security. Furthermore, wearing new clothes at every festival motivates individuals to buy the new outfits to look beautiful. They try to follow the new trends and wear those attires. Last but not the least is online shopping. This is so easy way to place order on phone and recive the product at home. People do not need to go somewhere and within their comfort zone they can bought their favourite clothes.

It is significnt important to persuade people to reduce the over buying of clothes.Firstly to buid the habit to repeat old clothes.This can be possible with the help of famous TV stars. People not only follow them, but also adopt their habits. If they start repeating their outfits in public events, it will inspire common people to not feel shame to waer their old clothes. Secondly, by limiting the fashion advertisemnts. In this 21st era everybody has phones and they see a lot of adds on social media like instagram, facebook and even on youtube.

In Conclusion, there are many factors increasing the trend to bought more clothes like online shopping and to show good status,whereas limiting the fashion advertisemnets and following the outfit repeat trend can help to reduce this.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question and give relevant reasons, including emotional shopping, buying new outfits for festivals, and the convenience of online shopping. You also suggest two ways to reduce purchases: encouraging outfit repetition through public figures and limiting fashion advertising. These points make your response relevant and your overall position clear. However, some ideas are less fully explained than others. For example, you mention that people buy clothes to show their status in the introduction and conclusion, but do not develop this reason in the main body. The advertising suggestion is also introduced without explaining how restrictions or reduced exposure would change buying behaviour. Extend these points with a brief explanation or example to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on reasons, a paragraph on solutions, and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “First and foremost,” “Furthermore,” and “Secondly” help readers follow the main points, and the ideas generally progress logically. This already gives the essay a coherent shape. To make the organisation more polished, reduce the reliance on formulaic transitions and connect ideas more precisely. For instance, the move from emotional shopping to festival clothing could be linked by explaining that purchases are driven by both mood and social occasions. Some sentences also run together because punctuation and spacing are inconsistent, which weakens the flow. Clearer sentence boundaries and more varied referencing would make cohesion smoother.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “shopping habits,” “fashion advertisements,” “outfits,” and “social media.” There are also attempts at less common expressions, such as “overcome the emotions” and “feel the sense of security,” although these are not always natural in context. Word choice and spelling errors are noticeable: “at every occasions,” “recive,” “significnt,” “adds,” and “bought” reduce accuracy, while repeated use of “clothes” and “people” limits variety. Aim for more precise collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, describe shopping as a way to “cope with emotions,” and refer to “impulse purchases” or “consumer demand” where appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “If they start repeating their outfits in public events, it will inspire common people.” This shows some range, and the main message remains understandable. However, grammatical errors occur in several patterns. Examples include “at every occasions” (number agreement), “they can bought” (verb form), and “people do too much clothing shopping” (sentence construction). There are also missing spaces after full stops and commas, and some sentences need clearer punctuation. Review articles, plural forms, and verb patterns, especially after modal verbs such as “can.” More accurate control of these structures, alongside the complex sentences you already attempt, would make the writing easier to read.

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