Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

With the increase in the fashion trend of clothes people more influenced with this leads to buy more and more clothes. There are many reasons behind buy many clothes but can persuade to reduce the number of clothes they purchase. In my coming paragraphs I am going to discuss the reasons of this.

To begin with , the reason people love to acquire new clothes is that they love to follow new trend . Young generation always try to follow their idol steps and try to wear same type of clothes, Moreover social media plays a vital role in impacting a person's personal interest and tast e depending which trend they are chasing . In addition, eye catching advertisements ,strong appeal , easely available always attracts people to buy more clothing stuffs though their wardro,es are full of these items .People like different nations clothes because of world wide exploration. Additionally, some people do not want to wear the same clothes because of their status so they want new ones at every occasion.

However. people can reduce the number of clothes. They can shopping only those items of dresses which they realy need rather then spending too much money on every thing. For example , one should save money for their important tasks or for better future.

IN conclusion, even though people wants to go with trend leads more and more shopping through online .can mitigate with few wise decisions for future .investments

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt—reasons for over-consumption and solutions—but the development is superficial. While you identify factors like social media and trends, the explanations lack depth and specific examples. The solutions provided are brief and lack practical detail. Furthermore, the response falls short of the 250-word minimum requirement, which negatively impacts the overall task achievement score. To improve, ensure you expand on your points with concrete examples and provide a more thorough discussion of how people can be persuaded to change their habits, ensuring you meet the length requirement to fully develop your arguments.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is often disrupted by awkward phrasing and grammatical errors. While you use some cohesive devices like 'To begin with' and 'In addition', their use is sometimes mechanical or incorrectly placed. The transition between ideas is occasionally abrupt, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of your argument. Paragraphing is present, but the concluding paragraph is fragmented and does not effectively summarise the main points. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each paragraph has a clear, unified focus will help improve the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms such as 'clothes', 'buy', and 'new', which restricts your ability to express complex ideas precisely. There are several spelling errors, such as 'easely', 'tast e', and 'wardro,es', which indicate a lack of control over written English. To reach a higher band, you should aim to incorporate a wider range of topic-specific vocabulary related to consumerism, fashion, and sustainability. Avoid repeating the same words and focus on using more precise synonyms to convey your meaning more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'people more influenced'), sentence structure (e.g., 'can persuade to reduce'), and punctuation (e.g., 'However. people'). The range of structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with some attempts at complex ones that are often faulty. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject and verb. Additionally, proofread your work to correct common errors in articles, prepositions, and verb tenses.

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