Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this modern era, the rise of fashion has led to a significant increase in consumer spending on apparel, with individual in many countries purchasing far more clothing then they actually require. This is happening because of social media marketing and low cost garments shown in the advertisement, and the promotion of sustainable fashion alternatives.

The primary reason behind excessive clothing purchases are trending digital marketing and affordability of modern apparel. In addition to this, some people have a thought to not to repeat clothes. In some countries like as India so many rituals and functions are taking place in the families, due to which people think they should buy new clothes on every function and this type of thinking is kept by each and every member of the family.

According to my knowledge or experience, I believe that buying clothes unnecessarily is just wastage of money, because after wearing clothes just few times we have a feeling of either throwing it in garbage or giving it in donation. Sometimes, the clothes are actually donated to needy people, but most of the time some thrift store take it to resell them. Furthermore, by spending out of budget not only effect on our saving but also brings a bad feeling for people who are not able to buy modern or expensive clothes.

To conclude, I firmly believe that a person should maintain their budget and buy limited number of clothes each year. This will result into proper use of resources and will keep social media and other clothing advertisement agencies to remain in their limits of showing cost and low quality of clothing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for excessive clothing consumption and ways to persuade people to reduce it. However, the development of the second part is somewhat weak. While you mention that people should maintain a budget, you do not fully explore how society or authorities can actively persuade individuals to change their habits, other than a vague mention of advertising agencies. The ideas are relevant, but the explanation lacks depth in the second paragraph. To improve, ensure that each part of the prompt is given equal weight and that your suggestions for persuasion are more concrete and well-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition to this', 'Furthermore', and 'To conclude', which help the flow of ideas. However, some transitions feel a bit mechanical, and the connection between sentences within paragraphs could be smoother. For instance, the transition from discussing thrift stores to the impact on savings is slightly abrupt. Additionally, some referencing is unclear, such as 'this type of thinking' which could be more explicitly linked to the previous sentence. Overall, the progression of ideas is logical, but the use of cohesive devices could be more sophisticated.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'apparel', 'sustainable fashion', and 'excessive'. However, there are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'trending digital marketing' (instead of 'the trend of digital marketing') and 'effect on our saving' (should be 'affects our savings'). Some phrasing is repetitive, and there is a lack of more precise, academic vocabulary that would elevate the response to a higher band. Focusing on collocations and more natural phrasing will help improve your score in this area.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include 'individual in many countries purchasing' (should be 'individuals... purchase'), 'clothing then they actually require' (should be 'than'), 'some thrift store take it' (should be 'stores take them'), and 'result into' (should be 'result in'). These errors do not impede communication, but they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, pluralisation, and correct preposition usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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