Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

There is an ongoing debate about people who like to purchase a lot of clothes in different parts of the world. This increasing trend is based on the number of factors like growing fashion sense and how social media influences people in making choices regarding clothing.

The use of money on unnecessary buying is a serious concern of the modern world. In an era of inflation, people are striving hard to make ends meet; spending huge amount on clothing only for the sake of fashion is unjustified. Nowadays, people are familiar with latest fashion trends due to globalization of fashion industry. Moreover, massive online shopping platforms like temu and shein offers people with market competitive prices which results in bulk buying.

Famous personalities, celebrities and influencers actively update their lifestyle on social media which inspires many followers to copy their dressing sense. Additionally people on social platforms are either rich or get paid to wear brands but it influences ordinary people into purchasing more and more just to look like them. Moreover, clothing brands strategically attract people by puting their items on sale which compels buyers into wholesale purschasing. Although this approach leads to temporary satisfaction, itccan cause long term anxiety and stress.

Governments and social workers must work together to highlight the effects of this trend on mental health. People must understand that clothing is just a need and not an obesession. There should be certain limitations on brands or social media marketing which is promoting materialism. Another way to persuade people is to emotionally and religiously enlighten them on the effects of spending money on things they do not need.

In conclusion, a balance approach is required where people must understand what are their clothing needs and how much should be spend on them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have addressed both parts of the prompt: the reasons for excessive clothing consumption and potential solutions. Your ideas are relevant, such as the influence of social media, celebrity culture, and the role of online shopping platforms. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, while you mention 'religiously enlighten' as a solution, this is not fully explained or contextualized. To reach a higher band, ensure that each point is supported by a clear example or a more detailed explanation of the causal link. Your position is clear throughout, but the depth of analysis could be improved to fully satisfy the requirements for a higher band.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Additionally', and 'In conclusion' to link your ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the flow within paragraphs could be smoother. For example, the transition from the impact of social media to the strategy of clothing brands is a bit abrupt. Paragraphing is used appropriately, and each paragraph has a central topic. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that the relationship between sentences is more fluid and less reliant on simple listing words.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'globalization', 'materialism', and 'unjustified'. There are some spelling errors, such as 'puting', 'purschasing', and 'itccan', which are minor but noticeable. You also have some collocation issues, such as 'use of money' instead of 'spending money' or 'expenditure'. While your vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for higher bands. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations and ensure you proofread for spelling errors, as these detract from the overall quality of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'Although this approach leads to temporary satisfaction, it can cause long term anxiety and stress.' However, there are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('platforms... offers') and missing articles ('the' modern world). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but there are some minor slips. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, and try to incorporate more varied complex sentence structures to demonstrate greater control.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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