Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Shopping has now considered as habit and fun instead of need. In my areas of world, people buy a lot of things especially clothes. But at some point it should be controlled. This essay discusses the cause of this and possible attempts to control this.

No doubt, we all love to shop. At first, we buy things because we need them. For example, a newborn is born, he needs new clothes, so their mothers do shopping because they need it. Any one go to high school or someone started office, they all are reasons to buy clothes. But somehow in recent times people buy clothes without acknowledging that they already have a lot. This is mainly because of social media and influencers which influence people, as a result new shopping malls and retail stores have opened which urge the person to buy more as they give a lot of options. In many developed countries, shopping is becoming a leisure activity like if they want to hang out they go for shopping so, it's more like fun.

But this trend should be controlled. This can be done in number of ways. For example, the same electronics media that urges people to buy should be use to provide awareness regarding balanced purchasing. Moreover, documentaries should be aired regarding those areas are world which are deprived of basic necessities so one think to spend on them instead of buying clothes. As , we have noticed that shopping is becoming more as a hangout plan so age appropriate attractions should be developed so people can spend their free time enjoying those.

In conclusion, dresses and clothes are very important for one's life. To be well dressed and presentable it's okay to buy clothes. But we should take measures that this shouldn't become a habit.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt: the reasons for excessive clothing consumption and potential solutions. The ideas are relevant, such as the influence of social media and the shift toward shopping as a leisure activity. However, the development is somewhat superficial. For instance, the suggestion to use 'electronics media' to provide awareness is a good starting point but lacks specific detail on how this would effectively change consumer behavior. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments could be more thoroughly extended to reach a higher band. Overall, the response covers all requirements of the task adequately.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. There is a general progression of ideas; however, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as in the phrase 'Any one go to high school or someone started office'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the transition between sentences could be smoother. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the internal flow of ideas within paragraphs would benefit from more varied linking words to improve the overall coherence of the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to communicate their ideas clearly. There are some attempts at using topic-specific vocabulary, such as 'deprived of basic necessities' and 'leisure activity'. However, the range is somewhat limited, and there are instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'electronics media' instead of 'digital media' or 'social media'. Some phrasing is repetitive, and the overall lexical control is sufficient but lacks the sophistication or precision required for higher bands. The errors do not impede communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and article usage, such as 'Shopping has now considered as habit' and 'in some parts of world'. Some sentences are slightly awkward, like 'Any one go to high school or someone started office', which impacts the clarity of the intended meaning. While the writer attempts complex structures, these often contain errors. The punctuation is generally functional, but the frequency of grammatical slips prevents the response from reaching a higher band.

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