Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nawadays, certain individuals from some parts of the universe purchase plenty dresses. This has trigered a lot of concerns in the society. In this essay, I will state the reasons for that and also suggest the possible ways people can be convinced to reduce the number of clothes they buy while giving instances based on my past experiences.

Addmittedly, there are many answers to why people venture into such attitude. Firstly, pear group influence plays a vital role in making them do so. This can be popular in youngters and probably adults in the university. Most of them tend to buy new clothes so that they can follow the trend just like their age mates regarddless of their financial background. Secondly,the rise in the use of social media is one of the cause of it. To illustrate this point, beautiful garments are being displayed by a lot of models in different part of the world. This has gone to the extent of influencing some native cultures especially on the styles of dress. In order to meet up with the numerous attires of foreign tribe, one may likely acquire good number of clothes beyond the expectation.

To reduce this to a reasonable extent, authoriities should increase the taxation on imported clothes. This will definitely raise the price and consequently, decrease the patronage. For instance, Abaya, which is a trending muslim attire from dubai lost its popularity in Nigeria in the year 2020 due its hike in price as a result of rise in import duty. Another means of achieving it is by educating people on the risk of overspending. Knowing fully well that mismanagement of fund have kept some people in long time poverty, creating an awarenees on it to the public will indirectly trigger a reduction in purchase of irrelevant items including dresses.

To conclude, although the frequent use of social platforms and peer influence are considered as the backbone of humans getting many wears. This issue can be adressed by increasing taxes on such product and making the society to be aware of the downsides.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

The response addresses all parts of the task, examining both the reasons for excessive clothing purchases (peer influence and social media) and proposing practical solutions (increased taxation and public education). The writer establishes a clear position in the introduction and maintains it throughout the essay. Ideas are extended and supported with relevant examples, such as the mention of the Abaya trend in Nigeria in 2020. However, some arguments exhibit a slight tendency to over-generalise, and explanations could be developed with slightly more depth to reach higher bands. Overall, the prompt requirements are fully met, earning a solid Band 7.0 for Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay presents a clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Information and ideas are coherently structured with an introduction, body paragraphs addressing causes and solutions separately, and a brief conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'To illustrate this point' are employed to guide the reader through the text, though referencing and transition management are occasionally mechanical. Paragraphing is used sufficiently and appropriately, separating distinct ideas into distinct blocks of text. While cohesion is generally clear and effective, minor lapses in mechanical referencing keep this criterion at a Band 6.5 level.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student displays an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'patronage', 'mismanagement', and 'import duty'. However, there are notable spelling and word-choice errors that occasionally detract from precision, including 'Nawadays', 'trigered', 'Addmittedly', 'pear group', 'youngters', 'regarddless', 'cause' instead of 'causes', and 'awarenees'. Despite these frequent minor slips, the vocabulary remains sufficient to communicate the main ideas clearly, preventing the score from falling lower. These lexical limitations place the response firmly at a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over clause structures through relative clauses and conditional-style phrasing like 'In order to meet up with... one may likely acquire...'. However, grammatical and punctuation errors are frequent throughout the response. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('mismanagement of fund have'), missing articles ('due its hike'), and awkward phrasing ('humans getting many wears'). While these errors are noticeable and occasionally distract the reader, they rarely impede overall communication. This performance aligns well with the Band 6 descriptors for grammatical range and accuracy.

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