Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.
What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
It is a fact that many people buy far too much apparel in a few regions of the nation. There are several reasons for such a situation, and also a few visible influences too. Both the aspects are explained in the ensuring paragraph.
Discussing the reasons, the foremost one is citizen are attached to a particular clothing brand where there is a discount going on through various modes of sale. By this I mean, various sales and discounts are offered, such as Black Friday sale, Back to school day sale, Boxing Day sale. This attracts the youth to buy more clothes. The other cause is, a weekend stroll to the shopping mall or local shops. To explain this, many work professionals tend to enjoy their day at the weekend and end up visiting the malls as their last option and spend more money on clothes.
However, there are some steps to be implemented to persuade citizens to purchase less apparel. The primary solution is, spend time with your colleagues and friends on playing local games because spending time on sports activities will avoid going to shopping malls. Another solution is focusing on extra curricular activites such as swimming or hit the gym. This will encourage their mind to become sharp and avoid going to local shops and malls and encourages more towards their fitness goals.In additon , they can take their children to take for a walk in the evening. This also avoids getting buying more clothes.
Thus to conclude the topic, it can be finally commented that buying too many clothes has a bad effect on an individuals financial goals and end up in more bills at the end of the month. So, to avoid this people should spend more time on fitness activities and spending more time with their friends.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses both parts of the task, identifying reasons for excessive clothes buying, such as discounts and weekend mall visits, and suggesting solutions like fitness activities and hobbies. However, the development of ideas remains somewhat superficial. For example, the explanation that citizen are attached to a particular clothing brand because of sales is a bit repetitive, and the solutions rely heavily on avoiding malls through physical exercise, which lacks breadth. While the main requirements of the prompt are met, the support and extension of ideas align more closely with the Band 6 descriptor, where relevant ideas are presented but remain somewhat under-developed.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement and follows a logical structure, moving from an introduction to causes, solutions, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is utilised, though paragraph breaks and transitions are occasionally awkward, such as the missing space in 'goals.In additon , they can'. Cohesive devices are used, but sometimes mechanically or inappropriately, such as 'Both the aspects are explained in the ensuring paragraph.' Referencing is generally clear, but overall progression and cohesion fall into the Band 6 category due to mechanical transitions and minor formatting errors.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully using terms like 'apparel', 'work professionals', and 'extra curricular activites'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation issues, such as 'apparel in a few regions of the nation' where 'clothing' or 'clothes' would be more natural, and grammatical slips involving word forms like 'citizen are attached' instead of 'citizens are attached'. The vocabulary attempts less common items with some inaccuracy, placing the response firmly at Band 6.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The text contains a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some variety. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing throughout, such as 'getting buying more clothes', 'end up in more bills', and 'hit the gym' in a context requiring an infinitive or gerund matching 'focusing on'. Punctuation and spacing errors also appear, such as 'In additon ,'. While these errors do not severely impede communication, they persist across the text, preventing the response from reaching Band 7.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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