Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today's modern society, the trend of purchasing clothes has increased significantly, and people spend a huge amount of money on clothes. This is mainly due to individual personal interest or being influenced by social media. However, this can be prevented by taking necessary precautions.

To begin with, social media nowadays has become a hub for various clothing brands such as Zara, Lewis and Denim. These companies collaborate with different social media platforms and use advertisement to increase publicity and demand among consumers. As a result such marketing strategies, fosters curiosity and interest in the public and encourage them to purchase clothes. Moreover, these companies often collaborate with celebrities and models to promote their brands, as these public figure have a large number of followers in social media, their endorsement can influence consumers to purchase these products. For instance, many people get influenced by celebrities' attires and design choices. As a result it encourage them to purchase the exact clothing brand and invest their money in consuming various fashionable clothes.

However, this trend has a huge impact on global economy, as manufacturers have to meet the public demand. They introduce a wide range of fashionable clothes with various accessories and design such as golden buttons or silver collars. As a result, it leads to over consumption of goods and resources and increasing difficulty for manufacturers to obtain the materials. Also, people often choose brand named label over local merchants, individuals often gets distract by looking brands. At the end they purchase the same attire with a huge price, rather than buying the exact material through local consumers. For instance, clothing brand such as Denim, purchase material from other merchants and sell the product with brand price.

In conclusion, this trend can be prevented if people purchase a limited amount of clothing for their daily needs, thereby reducing unnecessary consumption and conserving global resources.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the task, discussing the reasons why people buy too many clothes, such as individual personal interest and the heavy influence of social media and celebrity endorsement. It also touches upon solutions, mentioning that this can be prevented by taking necessary precautions and purchasing a limited amount for daily needs. However, the second part of the prompt regarding how people can be persuaded to reduce their purchases is underdeveloped. While the writer hints at mindful purchasing in the conclusion, concrete persuasive strategies for society are lacking. Ideas are presented clearly with examples like Zara and celebrity attires, but overall development for the second prompt bullet point remains somewhat limited. This places the response firmly at Band 6.0 according to the criteria.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at paragraphing, separating the introduction, reasons, economic impact/side-discussion, and conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', 'As a result', and 'In conclusion' are employed to guide the reader through the text, although some transitions feel a bit mechanical. Paragraphing could be refined, as the third paragraph drifts somewhat into the global economic impact rather than strictly sticking to the primary reasons or solutions. Referencing is generally clear, though minor instances of awkward cohesion occur, such as 'As a result such marketing strategies, fosters curiosity'. Overall, the organization shows clear logical sequencing, warranting a Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and collocation phrases such as 'marketing strategies', 'celebrity endorsement', and 'over consumption'. However, there are noticeable word choice errors and slips, such as writing 'Lewis and Denim' (likely meaning Levi's and denim), 'public figure' instead of 'public figures', and 'gets distract by looking brands'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but expressions like 'attires' (attire is typically uncountable in this context) show minor inaccuracies. The lexical range is sufficient to communicate the main points clearly, but the presence of vocabulary errors prevents it from reaching a higher band, aligning well with a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conditional structures with varying degrees of success. There are several grammatical errors and punctuation slips throughout the text, for example: 'As a result such marketing strategies, fosters curiosity' (missing preposition, incorrect comma placement, and verb agreement error), 'as these public figure have' (pluralization error), and 'individuals often gets distract' (subject-verb agreement and voice errors). Despite these frequent errors, communication is rarely impeded, and the basic meaning remains clear throughout the response. This performance is characteristic of a Band 5.5 in grammatical range and accuracy.

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