Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There is no denying the fact that in some regions of the world some individuals purchase far too many clothes. This essay will discuss the causes for this trend and what can be done to convince people to think wisely and buy what they really need.

To begin with, there are many reasons why individuals buy a lot of clothes. Firstly, they have a high income level so they do not care about the price, or if they have the same colour of certain clothes. In other words, they have a kind of obsession with buying new outfits. In addition, they might like to showcase differently on each occasion and to wear the latest designs that are available in the market. For example, some categories of people feel more satisfied and more confident when they have too many clothes in their closet.

In terms of what can be done to reduce this approach and persuade them, it is to advise them to think wisely and only purchase some kinds of outfits if they really need them. Moreover, it is recommended to them that they spend their money on creating private businesses that will benefit them rather than just waste their income on clothes. Furthermore, remind them of the poverty that exists in some parts of the world, and that some groups of people cannot purchase their necessities. For instance, some African countries are really struggling with poverty, and they could not offer their families and children food and beverages.

In conclusion, there are several alternative ways to spend their money, and there are tremendous ways to persuade them to reduce the number of outfits they buy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the task by discussing the reasons why people buy too many clothes and suggesting ways to persuade them to reduce their consumption. The student develops ideas adequately, such as mentioning high income levels and the desire to wear the latest designs. However, the development of solutions is somewhat simplistic and repetitive, relying on general advice like telling people to 'think wisely' or reminding them of global poverty. While the position is clear throughout, the support for the ideas would benefit from greater depth and more specific real-world examples rather than broad generalisations. Overall, the task is addressed satisfactorily, aligning well with the expectations for a Band 6.0 performance.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the causes and the solutions. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as 'To begin with', 'In addition', 'In terms of what can be done', and 'Furthermore'. However, some of the referencing and transitions feel a bit mechanical or repetitive, particularly the phrase 'some categories of people' and 'some parts of the world'. Paragraph transitions could be smoother, and the logical progression occasionally stumbles due to slightly abrupt shifts between distinct points. Nevertheless, the organisation is clear enough to follow without difficulty, which firmly places this response at Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully using terms such as 'obsession', 'showcase', 'necessities', and 'alternative ways'. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, though word choice and collocation are occasionally unnatural, such as 'showcase differently on each occasion' instead of 'dress differently' or 'wear different outfits', and 'waste their income' where 'spend impulsively' might be more precise. Spelling and word formation are generally accurate throughout the response. The lexical range is sufficient to convey the intended meaning, although errors in collocation prevent it from reaching a higher band, making Band 6.0 an appropriate score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses such as 'There is no denying the fact that...' and 'while they do not care about the price'. There are instances of good grammatical control, but also several noticeable errors and awkward structures, such as 'they could not offer their families and children food and beverages', where 'provide' would be more grammatically and semantically suited than 'offer'. Punctuation is generally correct, and while errors do exist, they rarely impede communication. Because the writer manages a mix of structures despite frequent minor inaccuracies, this performance corresponds to a Band 6.0.

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