Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often said that in fever areas of the world, individuals purchase far too much attire. Meanwhile, I strongly agree with this to a certain extent. In the following paragraph, I will discuss the reasons behind this, as well as how to overcome the situation. This essay will explain why I support this perspective.

There are a number of factors behind it. The primary reason for my opinion is that dressing is a first impression; hence, people don't want to damage their reputation. For instance, up to the present time, 70 percent of people are going for jobs and business; consequently, they wear different outfits. This shows that they do not repeat them often. In addition to that, social media plays a huge role in this circumstance. Over time, most of the sellers market through reels and offers; therefore, buyers are attracted and purchase more even though they don't need.

There is a matter of great concern. We should use social media platforms to raise awareness among people. To illustrate, we should make reels and tell them that not everyone belongs to the same status, so that everyone cannot afford it. Moreover, we have to judge people by their work rather than their clothes. As a result, people might reduce their purchases and change their perspectives. Instead of buying a new collection, they could style it differently to give a better look.

In conclusion, I firmly agree that all generations like their fame because they buy too much raiment. Instead of purchasing a new one, try a different look from the same it will be a great idea.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task, discussing both the reasons behind excessive clothing purchases and potential solutions to reduce them. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack clarity. For instance, the argument that dressing creates a first impression is introduced, but the supporting example regarding job seekers and business people is somewhat confusingly linked and lacks sufficient depth. Your position is generally clear throughout the essay, although it is slightly confused by the introduction of agreement statements that do not entirely fit a 'reasons and solutions' prompt. To move to a higher level, you should extend and fully support your main ideas with more precise explanations and well-contextualized examples rather than relying on generalized assertions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into an introduction, body paragraphs addressing reasons and solutions, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used to separate different aspects of the task. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, and referencing is not always clear. For example, transitional phrases like 'There is a matter of great concern' feel abrupt and do not smoothly link the transition from causes to solutions. Additionally, referencing pronouns like 'it' in sentences such as 'from the same it will be a great idea' creates ambiguity. To achieve a higher score, you need to ensure that cohesive devices connect ideas more naturally and that logical progression between sentences is tightly maintained without abrupt shifts.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to use less common items such as 'attire', 'reputation', 'circumstance', and 'raiment'. However, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word form that occasionally impede communication or sound unnatural. Phrases like 'fever areas' instead of 'few areas' or 'certain areas', and 'like their fame because they buy too much raiment' reveal limitations in lexical control. Furthermore, some expressions are awkward or misused within the context. To reach a higher standard, you must expand your vocabulary range and use less common lexical items with greater precision, ensuring natural collocations and minimizing errors in word choice.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting various structures throughout the response. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, particularly when attempting complex sentences, which can cause some difficulty for the reader. Issues include awkward phrasing in clauses, preposition errors, and structural awkwardness such as 'even though they don't need' (missing an object) and 'from the same it will be a great idea'. Subject-verb agreement and article usage also show occasional slips. To progress further, you need to produce a higher proportion of error-free sentences when using complex grammatical structures and ensure better control over punctuation and clausal coordination.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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