Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In selective portions of the world, an individual purchase a significant number of clothes for their workplace or to fulfil their interest.

To begin with, one of the key factors is 5 or 6 days a week onsite jobs because every day they have to deal with customers or seniors in their field and different designs in clothing builds such a great confidence during the performance. Also, it creates a professional personality in front of a judge. Moreover, the majority of employees like variety in their daily clothing selection rather than keeping 5 or 6 pairs in wardrobe. For instance, a survey illustrates that, in recent years numerous formal clothing pairs were purchased by employees working with government or running their own business rather than fashion brand.

On the other hand, everyone should put some cap on spending for clothing because after 1 year a formal pair looks like new but it's just a piece of cloth due to improper fitting. To overcome this issue, the company should introduce an uniform for the whole staff and create various designs in shirts to differentiate the position such as blue shirts are for juniors and white shirts are for seniors. This small step will create equality in the company. In additation, an organization should create work-from-home environment for IT persons and it will creat a huge benefit for the employees and all will spend less on clothing. For example, an article demonstrates that ICICI bank started work-from-home for their employees and nowadays the bank has more savings due to less spending on clothings and equally for the staff members.

Taking everything into account, I believe using uniforms and work-from-home are perfect rather than spending a large of amount for clothes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing reasons why people buy many clothes, such as for onsite jobs and personal variety, and suggests solutions like company uniforms and work-from-home environments. However, the development of these ideas is uneven and limited. For example, the explanation regarding onsite jobs and building confidence is somewhat vague, and the notion of putting a cap on spending is abruptly introduced without a clear general premise. The position is generally clear, but the limited and under-developed nature of the supporting examples keeps the response at this level. To reach higher, the ideas need to be fully extended with more robust, detailed explanations and concrete real-world context.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a discernible progression of ideas, moving logically from the reasons for excessive clothing purchases to potential solutions in the body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'On the other hand', but some referencing and linking words feel mechanical or slightly awkward, as seen with 'and equally for the staff members'. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate the distinct prompts of the task, though the internal cohesion within paragraphs occasionally stumbles due to abrupt transitions between sentences. Improving the flexibility and natural flow of cohesive ties would elevate the organizational structure.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, demonstrating an attempt to incorporate less common items and subject-specific terms such as 'professional personality', 'government', and 'work-from-home environment'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward word choices, such as 'selective portions of the world' instead of 'certain parts of the world', 'purchase a significant number' with incorrect subject-verb agreement, and 'put some cap on spending'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but occasional issues with word form and collocation occasionally cause slight hesitation for the reader. Expanding the range of precise vocabulary and refining word collocation would significantly enhance this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response utilizes a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, such as conditional and relative structures, but attempts at complex syntax are frequently marred by errors. There are frequent issues with subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions, exemplified by phrases like 'an individual purchase', 'an uniform', and 'spending a large of amount for clothes'. Punctuation and grammatical patterns show persistent flaws that require some effort from the reader to parse, though they rarely completely impede communication. To achieve a higher band, the writer must demonstrate better control over complex grammatical structures and increase the proportion of error-free sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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