Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.
What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Clothes play vital role in everyone's life. In many nations, individuals purchase numerous dresses even though they do not need them. This essay will discuse the reason why they buy number of outfits becase of show off their wealth as well as how they can overcone this by doing charity.
To commence with, there are number of factors which show that why folks like to buy many garments. The first and foremost reason is show off of their money. To explain it, people buy expensive and extra clothes becase they want to show their wealth in front of their relatives and public.For instance, one surway was conducted by USA graments in 1994, they show that 85% individuals purchased attries becaue they want to show off in their frineds. Therefore, for getting the attention and show their wealth folks buy many outfits.
On the other hand, people can do charity for reduse this habiit. To illustrate it, there are various charity organisations who need finance and clothes, if people give their extra money and clothes in donation then it can overcome this problem.For example, a headline gave in the Canada tv news, they showed that in India there are many people who give clothes and other essential things in the donation instead of buying the new outfits. Hence with the help of charity folks can overcome the habit of buying extra attries.
In conclusion, although people purchase many dresses becase they want to show off their wealth in the public, they can reduce this habit by donate their extra money and clothes in charity organisations.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response partially addresses all parts of the task by identifying reasons for overbuying clothes and suggesting a solution through charity. However, the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the explanation regarding showing off wealth is repetitive and lacks depth, relying on a vague, unconvincing example involving a fabricated survey from 1994 by 'USA graments'. The second main body paragraph attempts to explain how charity reduces buying habits, but the reasoning is simplistic and the supporting example about a Canadian news broadcast discussing India is confusingly framed. While a position is discernible throughout the text, the lack of fully extended ideas and well-supported arguments keeps this response at a partial level of task completion.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt at paragraphing, dividing the response into a logical introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed to signal transitions, such as 'To commence with', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, the use of these cohesive devices often feels mechanical or repetitive. Referencing and logical progression are sometimes faulty, as seen in the awkward transitions between sentences within the body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to structure the text, but the internal flow of ideas lacks smoothness and precision, preventing the essay from achieving a more advanced organizational score.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate for the task. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary items, such as 'organisations' and 'essential', but these attempts are often accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, spelling, and word form. There are frequent lexical inaccuracies throughout the text, including misspelled words like 'discuse', 'becase', 'overcone', 'surway', 'attries', 'reduse', and 'habiit'. Additionally, phrasing such as 'numerous dresses' and 'show off of their money' lacks natural collocation. These errors in spelling and word choice cause some difficulty for the reader and reflect a restricted lexical range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response displays a limited range of grammatical structures, relying mostly on simple sentences alongside clumsy attempts at complex forms. Frequent errors are present in verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions within grammatical patterns. Examples include 'Clothes play vital role', 'there are number of factors', and 'by donate their extra money'. Attempts at subordinate clauses and relative structures are frequently faulty, leading to ungrammatical constructions such as 'there are various charity organisations who need finance and clothes, if people give...'. These frequent errors require the reader to decode the meaning and occasionally cause difficulty in comprehension.
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