Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this world of ultra-modernization, a significant chunk of individuals have a colossal collection of clothing. There could be several reasons for that; however, in my perspective, showing off and trendy fashion could be the main reasons for this. In the forthcoming, I will discuss reasons and ways to reduce this trend.

To commence with the reasons, there are two primary factors, but the most significant one is showing off. In other words, today many people, especially youngsters, are either college-going or working, so they want to establish a status in society; for that, they purchase a number of dresses. Apart from that, at a young age, many have to attend various occasions, in which they establish their status by wearing brand-new clothes. Another reason is trendy fashion: when people see their favourite celebrity on television wear a new kind of outfit, a desire to buy the same develops in individuals. In this way, they buy a collection of clothing. Thus, following new trends to show off becomes the main reason of overcollection.

Moving towards ways to reduce this overspending, firstly, the government should increase the taxes on big-brand clothes, so that people can think twice before buying them. In addition, through advertisement, legal bodies can shoud how people below the poverty line survive with limited clothes. In addition to that, elders in the family could have control on overspending on clothing, not only by limiting budgets of their offspring but also by observing their lifestyle. For example, students in Asian countries spend less amount on clothing as, their spending is managed by their parents, which prevent them buying limited attires.

In conclusion, according to the arguments aforementioned above, one can reach to the conclusion that although purchasing new clothes has become trend in the society for fashon and showing-off, but it can be prevented by parents by creating control on their kids spendings.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by identifying reasons why people buy excessive clothes and suggesting ways to reduce this trend. Your position is clear throughout the writing. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others, which places the response at this level. For instance, while the reasons regarding showing off and trendy fashion are introduced and explained with everyday examples like seeing celebrities on television, the discussion on solutions lacks deeper elaboration. The points about increasing taxes on big brands and family monitoring are relevant, but they remain somewhat general rather than fully extended with deeper analysis or concrete long-term impacts. To move to a higher band, ensure that every supporting point is thoroughly explored and justified with detailed explanations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with clear paragraphing, where each paragraph has a distinct focus ranging from introduction to reasons, solutions, and conclusion. You make use of various cohesive devices to guide the reader, such as 'To commence with', 'Apart from that', and 'Moving towards ways'. However, the cohesion can occasionally feel mechanical or repetitive, and referencing is not always completely clear, such as in the concluding sentence where the linkers become slightly tangled with 'although purchasing new clothes has become trend in the society... but it can be prevented'. To achieve a higher level of cohesion, cohesive devices should flow more naturally without drawing attention to themselves, and logical transitions between sentences should be smoother and more sophisticated.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, providing a sufficient range to discuss clothing trends and consumer habits. You attempt less common vocabulary items such as 'ultra-modernization', 'colossal collection', and 'overspending', which show an effort to expand your linguistic range. However, there are noticeable word-choice, collocation, and word-formation errors that reflect this band level, such as 'number of dresses' instead of outfits, 'shoud how' instead of show how, 'limited attires', and 'fashion and showing-off'. Additionally, there are minor spelling slips like 'fashon'. To reach a higher standard, you need to use less common lexical items with greater precision in style and collocation, while eliminating basic spelling and word choice inaccuracies.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like conditional and relative clauses, such as 'when people see their favourite celebrity on television wear a new kind of outfit...'. There are some errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text, but they rarely impede communication. Examples of grammatical slips include article and preposition issues like 'in my perspective' instead of from my perspective, 'reason of overcollection' instead of reason for, 'spend less amount', and punctuation and phrasing errors in the conclusion. To improve your grammar score, you should focus on increasing the frequency of error-free complex sentences and polishing your control over prepositions, articles, and agreement within more intricate grammatical patterns.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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