Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, individuals purchase numerous attires in some countries. This essay will explore the factors behind this trend and also answer the question on how people can encouraged to reduce the number of outfits they purchase.

One of the major reason why people invest in so many clothes is due to the affordability of clothes and this could be as a result of usage of cheap raw materials used in production of clothes. For Instance, most cotton wear are sourced from the cotton plants. This raw material is quite easy to obtain. And the production company spend little they or no amount in accessing the materials which are used for production of cotton garments, thereby making the clothes more affordable and cheaper. Furthermore the prevalence of technology has made it easier for people to shop online, thereby resulting in acquisition of more clothes than necessary. There are millions of online stores worldwide. People can stay at the comfort of their homes and buy clothes from any region of the world. They can easily compare the styles and reviews of clothes from different vendors online and would purchase several outfits that suit them best. For example, I once purchased multiple navey-blue jackets online because of how beautiful it appeared, even though I never wore the jacket at all .

Concerning the question on how people can be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes that they buy. I believe in order to curtail this habit, the government has a huge role to play. They can implement huge taxes on some of these clothing companies. If this is done, then prices of clothes would skyrocket, making individuals only invest in clothes that are absolutely necessary for them. Impulsive and reckless buying of clothes would drastically reduce. Also, online stores would not be spared, the taxes should be imposed on them as well.

In conclusion, the rate at which people purchase numerous attires these days is quite alarming. The affordability of these wears and the significant rise in online shopping have contributed to this act. To discourage people from buying too many clothes, the government can enact a new tax law to guide the clothing industries.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both questions and gives a clear explanation of two causes: affordable clothing and the convenience of online shopping. The personal example of buying jackets that were never worn helps illustrate how online browsing can encourage unnecessary purchases. You also propose a specific measure—taxing clothing companies and online stores—and explain that higher prices could discourage impulsive buying. However, the affordability explanation focuses mainly on cotton being easy to obtain, so the link between cheap materials and excessive purchasing could be developed more clearly. The proposed tax is also presented as the main solution without considering other ways to persuade consumers. Develop these points with more precise reasoning and supporting examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on the proposed solution, and a conclusion. Ideas generally progress logically, and signposts such as “Furthermore,” “Concerning the question,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the discussion. This organisation is effective, though some linking feels formulaic, and the causes paragraph contains several steps in the cotton-production explanation that could be connected more smoothly. The phrase “this act” in the conclusion is also a little vague in its reference. To strengthen progression, use clearer links between each cause and its effect, and make references explicit rather than relying on general terms such as “this.”

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonable range of topic vocabulary, including “affordability,” “prevalence,” “vendors,” “impulsive,” and “curtail.” These choices show an effort to go beyond basic wording, and the main ideas remain understandable. However, several expressions are unnatural or imprecise, such as “numerous attires,” “cotton wear,” and “invest in clothes”; “attire” is not normally used as a plural count noun, and “invest” suggests a different kind of spending. There are also spelling and word-form slips, including “navey-blue” and “For Instance.” Aim for natural collocations and consistent spelling, and avoid using elevated words where a simpler, more accurate phrase would communicate the idea better.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response includes both simple sentences and longer complex structures, for example, “People can stay at the comfort of their homes and buy clothes from any region of the world.” Most meaning is clear, and the writer attempts to explain cause and effect through clauses beginning with “thereby” and “even though.” Some grammatical errors remain, including “how people can encouraged” instead of a passive form such as “can be encouraged,” “One of the major reason” instead of “reasons,” and “the production company spend” instead of “spends.” There are also problems with articles and sentence boundaries, as in “And the production company…” after a full stop. Review agreement, passive constructions, and punctuation while retaining the variety of sentence forms.

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