Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this materialistic world, getting addicted to something is really easy. Some people purchase a large amount of clothes in some part of the world. There are multiple reason behind this behaviour and some ways to guide them to reduce the habit of purchasing unwanted garments . Both views will be dicussed in the following paragraphs.

Since some people live in big cities like Paris, New York and Bombay, where mostly everyone follows the latest fashion trends and this creates a sense of competition amongst everybody. Therefore, in order to satisfy their self satisfactory need and to compete with each other, people end up purchasing different clothes periodically. Moreover, it is an undeniable fact that, spendig money on anything impulsively is quite addictive. For instance, in an recent survey of world finance organisation, it has been witnessed that the huge amount spent on clothes were by people, who were shopping addictives, when asked the reason behind doing this activity repeatedly, the answer was quite basic as they were not satisfied with the way they look and buying new wardrobe made them feel confident and they were able to put together theirselves.

One of the best way to persuade anyone from shopping impulsively is educating them about the difference between the needs and wants. For example, one teenager who is buying clothes every month without the knowlege and need, giving them financial education about purchasing the stocks of the company instead of purchasing the clothes, will be really helpful for them to think twice before spending next time. Another way which could be accounted is getting self satisfaction with the way we look rather than satisfying others and competing with them over clothes and latest trends.

In conclusion, compettive fashion places and advertisements could be a great reason behind unnecessary clothes purchase; however, basic spending education and feeling confident with the way someone look could considerable help people to reduce the number of clothes they buy.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: you identify fashion competition and impulsive spending as reasons, then suggest education about needs versus wants and greater self-confidence as ways to reduce purchases. The examples, including the teenager and the survey, help make the discussion relevant. However, some points are more fully explained than others. The link between city life and buying clothes is asserted rather than clearly explained, and the survey example is difficult to assess because its source and findings are vague. The suggestion to invest in company stocks also needs a clearer connection to reducing clothing purchases. Develop each main idea with a specific explanation or a more credible, directly relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on causes, one on solutions, and a conclusion. Sequencing is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “For instance,” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger progression. However, linking is occasionally mechanical, and some references are unclear: “this” in the opening of the causes paragraph could refer to city life or following trends. The long survey sentence also combines several stages of the example, making the progression harder to track. Use clearer topic sentences and divide complex explanations into shorter, logically connected sentences.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary, including “materialistic,” “impulsively,” “fashion trends,” and “financial education,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts at less common expressions, but several are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “self satisfactory need,” “shopping addictives,” and “put together theirselves” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Spelling errors such as “dicussed,” “spendig,” and “knowlege” are noticeable, as are awkward combinations such as “competitive fashion places.” Aim for accurate collocations and check spelling carefully. Choosing simpler, natural phrases is more effective than using ambitious wording that does not fit the context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “Since,” “where,” and “when,” and the overall message can usually be followed. However, control is inconsistent, particularly in longer sentences. The opening cause sentence beginning “Since some people live in big cities” is a fragment because it lacks a main clause. In “spendig money on anything impulsively is quite addictive,” the structure after “it is an undeniable fact that” is incomplete. There are also agreement and article errors, as in “One of the best way” and “in an recent survey,” plus punctuation problems around commas. Build complex sentences around a complete main clause, and proofread agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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