Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

In 50 percent of the world people buy a lot of clothes usually they didn't want them, but they want to show the world So, they can imbalance the world and hurt the feelings of other who couldn't buy their clothes for basic need only.

The major reason for that the people of each part of world always wanted if the person was not happy then they wanted every other guy who saw they wanted to hurt their feeling at full extent So, they can be happy for the moment but inner they totally jealous because they only wanted to destroy someone's happiness because what they bought wasn't enough for them to satisfy but when they saw that people were hurting they feel joyed and that was very disturbing factor for the ones who wasn't buy a clothes for their basic need only.

One more reason in today world all people want to follow the trend they don't care about anyone else they want to look good So, everyone should follow them and give them a lot of admire and they live in people memory and they think that give them a happiness but that is totally lying in todays and in the past.

They all don't even have a proper knowledge wisdom and foresight. We should give them a proper therapy lesson and after when they realized what they did in their past was totally wrong then they shame on yourself and start doing what best for the people and start buying something that helpful to needy person and then they start being happy and leave that useful buying stuff and only buy for to fulfill their need and for needy person.

For example, People who are doing for other always happy and that was great fact and everyone should follow that fact will be happy in life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response attempts to address both questions: it gives reasons such as wanting attention and following trends, and suggests educating people and encouraging them to buy for those in need. These points are relevant, but the explanation is often unclear or speculative. For example, the claim that buyers want to “hurt the feelings” of people who cannot afford clothes is not convincingly explained, and the proposed “therapy lesson” is vague rather than a practical persuasion strategy. The example about people who help others being happy is also general and does not show how this would reduce clothing purchases. Develop more plausible causes, such as advertising or fast-changing fashion, and explain specific measures and why they might work.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: reasons are discussed before possible solutions, and “One more reason” signals a new point. However, progression within paragraphs is difficult to follow because several different claims are joined into long sentences, often with repeated “So” and “but.” The first paragraph, for instance, moves from buying unwanted clothes to imbalance and the feelings of people with fewer resources without clearly showing the links. References such as “they,” “that,” and “what they bought” are sometimes unclear. Use separate paragraphs for each reason and for solutions, and give each paragraph a clear main idea followed by explanation and a relevant example.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “follow the trend,” “basic need,” “foresight,” and “needy person.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are repetitive or imprecise, which sometimes makes the intended meaning hard to understand. Phrases such as “give them a lot of admire,” “they live in people memory,” and “leave that useful buying stuff” do not express the ideas naturally. There are also word-form and collocation problems, including “joyed” and “therapy lesson.” Build a more precise set of topic phrases for consumer behaviour and solutions, and check how words combine in English. For example, “admiration” and “raise awareness” would fit the intended meanings more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to express connected and complex ideas, but sentence control is inconsistent. Many sentences run on, as in the opening, where several clauses are joined without clear punctuation. Verb forms and agreement are also frequently inaccurate: “people … wanted,” “they feel joyed,” and “they shame on yourself” do not maintain correct forms or subjects. Articles and plurals are often missing or incorrect, as in “buy a clothes” and “for basic need.” These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then combine them using accurate conjunctions and punctuation. Pay particular attention to subject–verb agreement, past and present tense consistency, and article use.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.