Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, people spend lot of money to buy clothes to look good in front of everyone. This is will include the reasons for this trend, and what can be done to persue people to reduce the number of the clothes they buy.

One of the main reasons for this trend is that people like to get up to date with fashion. They regularly refresh some websites of clothing to see if there are any latest clothes available or not. In addition to this, some people like to follow public figures to identify their fashion sense, and they would love to buy same clothes that have been wore by celebreties without even checking its price. Furthermore, some clothing brands offers discount on particular items, and that's the time when people buy unnecessary clothes. For instance, one survey conducted by NIKE which states that, when they put discount on Air Jordan shoes, people were crazy to buy these shoes, and they made 1 Million dollars across the world by selling only Jordan shoes.

People can be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy by knowing the importance of money. Many people spent lot of money on buying expensive clothes to look good. Particularly, many young adults think that their clothes reflects their personality to everyone, which is completely wrong. In order to solve this issue, their parents need to teach them that how important it is to save money for future at an early age. They should encourage their children to buy necessary things like books, laptop, and any other education related things rather than wasting money on buying unnecessary clothes. For example, when they become younger their clothes won't fit them because of growth in their size of body and muscle. On the other hand, books and laptop can be useful for a lifetime.

To conclude, people buy too many clothes to follow their passion for fashion. However, they also need to keep in mind that buying unnecessary clothes won't save their money, which sometimes leads to live a middle-class life for a lifetime.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: fashion-following, celebrity influence and discounts are offered as reasons, while financial awareness and parental guidance are proposed as ways to reduce purchases. The examples about Air Jordan discounts and young people outgrowing clothes help make the discussion relevant. However, the reasons are developed more fully than the solutions: the advice to teach saving and prioritise educational items is clear, but it would benefit from explaining how this would change buying habits or adding broader measures, such as promoting clothing reuse. The claim that buying clothes can lead to a “middle-class life” is unclear and does not convincingly support the conclusion. More precise explanation of this point and fuller development of the solutions would strengthen the response.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for reasons and solutions, and a conclusion. Ideas generally progress logically, and signposts such as “Furthermore,” “For instance,” and “To conclude” help readers follow the discussion. Some connections are less smooth or precise. For example, “On the other hand” introduces a contrast between clothes and books or a laptop, but the relationship would be clearer with a direct comparison. The opening sentence also says the essay will explain the trend and persuasion methods, but the phrasing is awkward. Use linking expressions selectively and make sure each one accurately describes the relationship between ideas; clearer references between sentences would also improve flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to discuss fashion and spending, including “fashion sense,” “public figures,” “discount,” and “save money for future.” There are also attempts at more specific language, such as “unnecessary clothes” and “education related things.” However, several word choices, collocations and spelling errors reduce precision: “refresh some websites” is not the natural expression for checking them, “latest clothes” is vague, and “celebreties” is misspelled. Repetition of “clothes,” “buy,” and “money” also limits flexibility. Build a wider set of natural phrases for consumer behaviour and clothing, and check spelling and word forms. More precise vocabulary would help express the ideas without relying on repeated general terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning “when” and “because,” and most of the message remains understandable. Some grammatical errors occur in sentence construction, agreement, articles and verb forms. For example, “This is will include” has an incorrect verb structure, while “some clothing brands offers” and “their clothes reflects” show subject–verb agreement problems. In “clothes that have been wore,” the participle form is incorrect, and “teach them that how important it is” uses an unnecessary “that.” There are also awkward constructions such as “leads to live a middle-class life.” Review agreement, verb forms and clause patterns, then proofread each sentence. Greater accuracy in these areas would make your varied sentence attempts more effective.

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