Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Buying more clothes is nowdays becoming trend in some countries because they wants to look good and modern. But, this can be reduced by telling them about it increases their financial burden and it also hurts the people who can not afford new dresses. This essay will discuss the reasons and how people can be influenced that they limited their buying more clothes.

One of the most significant reason behind this is that, individuals are usually buying more clothes to looks good infront of others. Moreover, they prefer to wear these new ones on occasions where everyone praised them. They feel happy and admired after listening good words for their party wears. Additionally, to continue modernicity people usually buy more casual wears. Most of the people belive that, other people not like them if they repeat the same dress again and again. For example, In Asian contries, teachers are usually wear new and different style dress to listen compimentary words from their colleagues and from students as well.

In addition to this, this nature of buying new clothes can be lessen by counseling them that it only burdenized you financially. People have to spend a lot of money to buy new clothes and this would lead to financially unstable. Similarly, eduacte them how to spend money in a useful way to maintain increasing inflation rates. Another important point is that, tells them everyone can not afford this trend thus it creates negative feelings in poor people hearts and makes them sad. For instance, in most areas, companies make it compulsory to follow same dress code.

In conclusion, although its trend is prevalling in many dsitant areas because human want to show themselves beautiful and modern infront of other, it can be controlled by teaching people about economic hardship and also inform them about feeling of sadness in non-affording people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both parts of the question: it explains that people buy clothes to look modern and gain admiration, then suggests financial education and awareness of the effect on people who cannot afford new clothes. These ideas are relevant, and the examples about teachers’ clothing and workplace dress codes help illustrate the discussion. However, some points are not fully explained. For instance, the dress-code example does not clearly show how people can be persuaded to buy fewer clothes, and the impact on poorer people is asserted rather than developed. The introduction and conclusion state the main ideas, but the argument would be stronger if each proposed solution were linked to a practical way of changing buying habits and supported with clearer explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, a paragraph on reasons, a paragraph on solutions, and a conclusion. The progression from causes to possible responses is easy to follow, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “Additionally,” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. However, some linking is mechanical, and the relationship between ideas is occasionally unclear. For example, “In addition to this” does not specify what it refers to, while the final example about companies requiring a dress code does not clearly connect to the preceding point about financial hardship. Referencing is also sometimes vague, as in “this nature” and “it.” Make the links between each example and the main point more explicit, and use transitions that show the precise relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “financial burden,” “modern,” “occasions,” and “dress code,” and it attempts some less common expressions such as “financially unstable.” However, noticeable word-choice, word-form, and spelling errors reduce precision and can make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “modernicity,” “burdenized,” “prevalling,” and “compimentary”; phrases such as “party wears” and “infront of others” are also not natural in this context. Some wording is repetitive, particularly the repeated references to buying new clothes and looking modern. Build a more accurate range of collocations for consumer behaviour and persuasion, and check spelling and word forms carefully so that your ideas are expressed naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “because,” “where,” and “although,” and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response. For example, “they wants” should be “they want,” “to looks good” should be “to look good,” and “teachers are usually wear” needs a corrected verb form. The sentence beginning “Another important point is that, tells them” is incomplete in its current structure, while “it only burdenized you financially” shifts awkwardly between the subject and the reader. Work on forming complete clauses and checking subject–verb agreement and infinitive forms. More accurate control of these patterns would make the argument easier to read.

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