Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Trend of buying more and more clothes is increasing in some parts of the world. People spend a lot of their time in shopping. This essay will delineate the reasons behind this trend and possible suggestions to convince people to buy clothes just according to their need.

First and foremost, people are greatly influenced by dressing of celebrities. They want to look like them. Hence they buy the same outfit. A lot of clothing brands are launched with facinating variety. They advertise their new designs frequently. When people see them, they can not control themselves from buying such clothes. Furthermore, girls are very curious about their dressing and they want to have so many clothes for daily use. They try to wear new clothes without even repeating a single outift. Addiotionally, people have linked different occassions with clothings. They think that it is very essential to wear new clothes on each event. Hence they spend a lot of their time and money on buying new clothes. Nevertheless, this trend is not the same all over the world.

Conversely, people have to understand the fact that buying so many clothes is not benificial.They can attend events without wearing new clothes because events are held to celebrate happiness and not for show-off. They have need to focus on improvement of their lives instead of following celebrities. Proper councelling is very essential for the diversion of their attention.

To sum all, it is important to wear sophisticated and comfortable clothes according to weather conditions. But buying new one is not essential. There is no problem in repeatiting the same outfit.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both parts of the question: you identify reasons such as celebrity influence, frequent advertising, interest in having different outfits, and expectations around special occasions, then suggest counselling and changing people’s priorities. The response is relevant and your main position—that people should buy clothes according to need—is understandable. However, several points are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that girls want many clothes for daily use is broad and would benefit from a reason or example; likewise, “proper counselling” is not explained in practical terms. The solutions are less developed than the causes, and the final point about comfortable clothing does not directly show how people can be persuaded to buy less. Develop each solution and connect it clearly to the problem.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph explaining causes, a paragraph offering solutions, and a conclusion. Sequencing within the causes paragraph is generally clear, and signposts such as “First and foremost,” “Furthermore,” and “Conversely” help readers follow the discussion. However, the progression is sometimes mechanical, with several ideas joined by “Hence” or “Additionally” rather than developed through clear links. The shift from “girls” to people generally is abrupt, and “Nevertheless, this trend is not the same all over the world” is not followed by an explanation, so it interrupts the argument. The solutions paragraph is also brief compared with the causes. Use clearer links between claims and explanations, and ensure each paragraph advances one focused line of reasoning.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “influenced,” “advertise,” “occasions,” “sophisticated,” and “comfortable,” which makes the subject clear. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “delineate the reasons” and “diversion of their attention.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, including “dressing of celebrities,” “fascinating variety,” “linked different occasions with clothings,” and “repeatiting the same outfit.” Spelling errors such as “facinating,” “Addiotionally,” “occassions,” and “benificial” are noticeable and reduce control. Some expressions, including “show-off,” are also not well suited to the formal argument. Aim for accurate, natural combinations such as “celebrities’ clothing” and “special occasions,” and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including cause-and-effect structures such as “When people see them, they can not control themselves from buying such clothes” and a relative clause in “clothes according to weather conditions.” Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, and the response is divided into clear sentences. However, there are some recurring grammatical problems. For example, “Trend of buying” needs an article, “They have need to focus” has an incorrect verb pattern, and “buying new one is not essential” lacks appropriate plural or article marking. The sentence “There is no problem in repeatiting the same outfit” also has an incorrect form after the preposition. Work on articles, countable nouns, verb patterns, and gerund forms, while varying sentence structures without making them difficult to control.

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