Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 20 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some parts of the world, people buy far too many clothes.

What are the reasons for this?
How can people be persuaded to reduce the number of clothes they buy?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Due to advancement of technology, majority of the people buy too many clothes in many countries. This essay will first suggest that the biggest problem caused by this phenomenon follow inluencers lifestyle, discounts as well as offers and then argue that awareness the people and penalities the people are the most viable solutions.

There are some reasons of this issue but one prominent reason is influence from role models. Most of time cloth companies are hire big celebrities to promote their clothes for advertisements. For instance, Diljit dosanjh is a famous actor of punjabi film industry and " old navy" company hire him to promote clothes. When young generation watch the advertisement not only on television but also on mobile phone they put pressure to their parents to buy that type of clothes. Moreover, the big companies gives offfers to people such as buy one get one free as well as 10% discounts on the items and people are more attractive towards these offers and buy unneccessary clothes.

However, there are some solutions to overcome this problem but one major solution is awareness campagins. It is a responsibility of governemnet they should aware the youth about production of clothes. The factories emit harmful gases while production the fibre as well as wastage of water. Furthermore, governments should not only make stringent laws on brands who give unneccessary offers but also put high amount of penality who promote the clothes through famous people.

In conclusion, although buying too much clothes is a major issue nowadays but this problem become mitigated by joined effort of both people and governemnts. follow influencers lifestyle and attraction towards offers are the reasons ans this problem can be solve by government to aware the people.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both parts of the question: you identify celebrity influence and promotional offers as reasons, then propose awareness campaigns and penalties for brands. The examples about a celebrity advertisement and “buy one get one free” offers make the causes relevant. Your solution paragraph also explains environmental harms, which gives awareness a clear purpose. However, some ideas are less fully developed than others: the proposed penalties are not clearly linked to reducing consumers’ purchases, and the conclusion’s suggestion that governments should “aware the people” does not clearly restate how the solutions would work. Develop each solution with a specific mechanism or example, and make the relationship between the proposed action and fewer purchases explicit. Your main position is present, though the opening and conclusion could express it more clearly and consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph on causes, a paragraph on solutions, and a conclusion. The shift from causes to solutions is signalled by “However,” and “Moreover” helps add a second cause. This gives the reader a generally coherent path through the answer. Some connections are less clear or mechanical, however. The opening says the essay will discuss problems, although the task asks for reasons, and the final sentence repeats the causes and solutions in a confusing order. In the solutions paragraph, the link between environmental awareness and penalties for brands could also be made more explicit. Use topic sentences that directly identify each paragraph’s purpose, and make the conclusion summarise the argument rather than introduce an unclear final claim.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of vocabulary for the topic, including “role models,” “promote,” “discounts,” “awareness campaigns,” “stringent laws,” and “harmful gases.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and some topic-specific language is attempted. However, word choice, collocation, and spelling are often inaccurate, which limits precision: “people are more attractive towards these offers” is not a natural way to describe consumer response, while “follow influencers lifestyle” and “production of clothes” are awkward in context. There are also spelling errors such as “penality,” “unneccessary,” and “governemnet.” Build accuracy by learning common word partnerships and checking spelling, especially for key terms. More precise phrasing would make the argument sound clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a “not only … but also” construction and a sentence beginning “When young generation watch…”. This shows some range, and the main meaning is usually recoverable. However, there are some recurring errors in sentence structure, agreement, articles, and verb forms. For example, “Most of time cloth companies are hire” has problems with the article and verb pattern, and “the big companies gives” does not match the plural subject. In “although buying too much clothes is a major issue nowadays but…,” the conjunctions are used together incorrectly, and “this problem become mitigated” has an inaccurate verb form. Review subject–verb agreement and clause patterns, then proofread each sentence for a complete, correctly formed verb structure.

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