Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Certain individuals believe that extra curriculum based subjects, like music, drama, art and craft, ought to be made mandatory in the secondary-school, as these activites can improve overall study performance. I fully agree with this statement and my opinion will be justified in the upcoming paragraphs.

In the schools, to constantly study subjects, like Mathemetics, Science and History is a boring thing for some students, as they are tough and drain more energy. Thus, by adding subjects like art and music, learners can actually stay stick to their study. For instance, in my school, there were some students, who used to focus more on science subjects just because, they had to attend their favourite art related classes on that day.

Secondly, art can also improve the imagination and critical thinking, which helps them to utilize it in academic subjects. To explain it further, It is scientifically proved that in order to draw art and potraits, it requires our imagination and critical thinking. Consequently, it makes our brain sharp, which can help to solve tricky formula of maths. Therefore, it can better overall academic performance.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response addresses the prompt by expressing a clear position on the inclusion of extracurricular subjects. However, the task is a General Training Task 1, which requires a letter format (e.g., formal, semi-formal, or informal). You have written an essay instead of a letter. This is a significant misunderstanding of the task requirements. While you present relevant ideas regarding the benefits of art and music, the failure to adopt the correct format (letter) and tone significantly impacts the score. To improve, ensure you carefully read the instructions to identify the required format, recipient, and purpose of the correspondence.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'In the schools,' 'Thus,' 'For instance,' and 'Secondly.' However, the transitions are sometimes mechanical, and the flow between sentences could be more sophisticated. The paragraphing is appropriate for an essay structure, but because the format is incorrect for the task type, the overall coherence is affected by the mismatch between the content and the expected letter structure.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'mandatory,' 'secondary-school,' 'scientifically proved,' and 'academic performance.' There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'stay stick to their study' (should be 'stay focused on their studies') and 'draw art and potraits' (should be 'create art and portraits'). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. Focus on learning common collocations to improve naturalness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. For example, 'In the schools, to constantly study subjects... is a boring thing' is awkward phrasing. You also have punctuation and article errors, such as 'Mathemetics' (spelling), 'the secondary-school' (unnecessary article), and 'tricky formula of maths' (should be 'tricky mathematical formulas'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.