Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-11-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the recent years, health problems issues increasing in recent times beacuse of the environment effect. Number of people are faccing this problem they are trying to change the tablets and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. I think it is a positive as well as negative development I will elaborate in the upcoming paragraph and give reason behind this.

On the positive side, there are several benefits to visiting usual doctor. One of the main reason is doctor know patient very well and also they know about their disease and how to reduce effect of disease they know very well. The another interesting point is when patient wants to change their doctor the new doctor are again charge the case fee as well as doctor tails patient to submit new reports. Moreover,people like to visit their family doctor because they charge less as comapred to others and also give the best treatment. For instance, in Finland their health care system was very nice and their citizen hire a doctor for a life time for their families and relatives.

On the other hand, there are also negative points about this one of this

disadvantage is when we were rely on the one doctor they do not focus our health and also they charge high money. Everone has cannot afford the high fees of the doctor becasue of this they change their treatments as well as individual try different types of medicine. For example, in India many patients are suffering from heart disease the hospital are charging high moneys and not gave the proper treatment.

In conclusion, from the mention above if the patients feel beter with their known doctor they can go there, however, patients not feel good they should be definately change the medicine as well as doctor.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You give a clear, though mixed, response by presenting both positive and negative aspects and offering a final recommendation. However, the task asks whether the trend of using alternative medicines instead of a usual doctor is positive or negative, while much of your discussion shifts to changing doctors, doctors’ fees, and family doctors. This makes the position only partly focused on the question. The examples about Finland and India are relevant to healthcare access, but their connection to alternative treatments is not explained, and claims such as doctors charging high fees need further support. To strengthen the response, state clearly which side you consider stronger and develop reasons specifically about the safety, effectiveness, or accessibility of alternative treatments.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

Your response has a recognisable introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “On the positive side” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. These divisions help readers identify the broad structure. However, progression within the paragraphs is difficult to follow because several points are repeated or loosely connected: the first body paragraph moves from doctors knowing patients to fees, reports, and Finland without clearly linking each point to the task. The conclusion also introduces a recommendation that is not fully established in the discussion. Some linking phrases, including “Moreover” and “For instance,” are used, but they do not always make the relationship between ideas clear. Organise each paragraph around one main reason, explain it, and connect the example directly to alternative treatment.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use basic vocabulary relevant to healthcare, including “disease,” “treatment,” “health care system,” and “heart disease,” so the general subject is understandable. However, the range is limited and several phrases are repetitive or imprecise, such as “high money,” “change their treatments,” and “the best treatment.” Spelling errors such as “beacuse,” “faccing,” “comapred,” and “definately” also reduce accuracy. Some word combinations are difficult to interpret, including “doctor tails patient to submit new reports.” Aim for more precise expressions connected to the question, such as describing patients who “turn to alternative therapies” or discussing whether a treatment is “clinically effective.” Proofreading spelling and collocations would make your meaning clearer.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the overall meaning can usually be understood. There are some correctly formed sentences, such as “For instance, in Finland their health care system was very nice,” but control is inconsistent. Errors in agreement and verb forms appear in “the new doctor are again charge” and “the hospital are charging,” while “Everone has cannot afford” shows difficulty forming a negative clause. Articles and sentence boundaries are also problematic, as in “One of the main reason” and the run-on opening sentence. These errors sometimes make the reader work to understand the intended relationship between ideas. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement, complete clause structures, and punctuation, then check each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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