Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In recent times, instead of visiting the doctor, a large number of people are embracing traditional medicines and treatments. This a negative development because it could lead to financial constraint and more health problems.

First and foremost, trying alternative medicines could lead to financial constraint. This is because most traditional medicines are expensive to purchase. When people seek these complementary therapies, they spend lots of money receiving different kinds of treatment, they believe that since these medicines are gotten from plants, it would be more beneficial to try natural remedies, rather than receiving orthodox treatments. The truth is that, these medicines are very costly to source for because the traditionalists who provide these treatments find it difficult to obtain them. As a result, they ensure they make good profits from it. For instance, traditional remedies made from cinnamon plants may be relatively expensive to buy because of its scarcity, despite its health benefits. If individuals spend heavily on these treatments, it would lead to bankruptcy. As a result, this may lead to financial instability.

In addition, receiving non-conventional treatments could lead to more health issues. The reason is that most herbal remedies do not have a specific dosage which individuals could take. Therefore, they consume little or large amount of these medicines which could cause problems to their health. In addition, most of these medicines are not regulated by the authorities, which may pose harm to the people who try them. This is because some of the ingredients used are unknown. When individuals neglect conventional treatments or visiting their doctors, they may develop illnesses. But due to ignorance, the illness may progress rapidly to terminal diseases. For example, many individuals who went against medical advice on the consumption of herbal drugs may develop long-term illnesses. Consequently, this could lead to complications,

In conclusion, currently, a large number of people are trying traditional remedies, instead of visiting their doctor. This development could possibly lead to financial constraint and other health problems.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses the prompt by clearly stating a position that the trend is negative. The two main arguments—financial burden and health risks—are relevant and logically linked to the topic. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat repetitive. For instance, the discussion on financial constraints focuses heavily on the cost of ingredients without exploring broader economic implications or the opportunity cost of delaying professional care. While the position is clear throughout, the supporting examples, such as the mention of cinnamon, are a bit simplistic. To reach a higher band, you should aim to provide more nuanced analysis rather than repeating the same point in different ways.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central topic sentence. The progression of ideas is logical, moving from financial concerns to health risks. You use cohesive devices such as 'First and foremost,' 'In addition,' and 'Consequently' to link your points. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally repetitive. For example, the phrase 'this could lead to' is used frequently to start sentences, which limits the flow. Improving the variety of your linking words and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would enhance the overall cohesion of the essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'complementary therapies,' 'orthodox treatments,' and 'terminal diseases' appropriately. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'source for' (which is redundant) and 'gotten from' (which is informal). Additionally, the repetition of words like 'medicines' and 'treatments' suggests a need for a wider range of synonyms to improve precision. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, incorporating more sophisticated collocations or topic-specific terminology would help you achieve a higher score in this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While many sentences are clear, there are recurring grammatical errors. For example, 'This a negative development' is missing a verb, and 'little or large amount' should be 'small or large amounts.' There are also issues with punctuation, such as the comma splice in '...kinds of treatment, they believe that...' and the incomplete sentence at the end of the second body paragraph. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and sentence boundary punctuation will significantly improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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