Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Nowadays, a growing tendency of individuals opt for alternative medicines and treatments rather than the consultation with their physical doctors. This whole scenario happens at that time, when they caught by a disease. From my perspective, this is a negative development.

Firstly, nowadays, the general populace of any society are struggling to cure their own diseases by using their own created methods. Furthermore, for this treatment, they use online sources for finding the way of treating specific diseases. In fact, they tend to buy online products and use them without knowing the unfavorable impacts on their well being. It results in, not merely detrimental overall well being but also disturb their mental and physical pursuits.

Another significant factor is a scam which rampant in our society to a large extent. These individuals mostly target the greedy population, they advertise their useless products in lower prices and attract the concentration of the individuals who are looking for online health products in cheaply costs. This would result in cancer, obesity, chronic heart diseases.

A prime instance is my uncle's wife, who purchased an online product and started its use without the consultation of her doctor. After couple of days, she felt some pain in her right kidney. In addition, after checking to a doctor, the doctor told her that, her right kidney was out of order due to the use of adverse products.

To put it briefly, though buy online products is a beneficial for the individuals but it's not mean to buy health products and starts its use without the consent of a doctor.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the trend is negative. The main ideas—the dangers of self-diagnosis via the internet and the prevalence of medical scams—are relevant. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited. The example of the uncle's wife is specific but lacks a broader analytical connection to the argument. The conclusion is slightly contradictory, as it suggests online products can be beneficial, which weakens the stance established in the introduction. To reach a higher band, you should ensure that your supporting arguments are more thoroughly explained and that your conclusion consistently reinforces your initial position without introducing conflicting ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Firstly', 'Furthermore', and 'In addition' to link ideas. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions are awkward, such as 'This whole scenario happens at that time, when they caught by a disease.' Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, which impacts the overall progression of the argument. Improving the variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will help improve the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'physical doctors' instead of 'general practitioners' or 'medical professionals', and 'cheaply costs' instead of 'low prices'. Some phrasing is also repetitive or unnatural, such as 'the general populace of any society are struggling to cure their own diseases'. To improve, focus on learning common collocations related to health and medicine and avoid translating directly from your native language, which can lead to unnatural phrasing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Examples include 'a growing tendency of individuals opt' (should be 'opt'), 'when they caught by a disease' (should be 'when they are caught'), and 'it's not mean to buy' (should be 'it does not mean'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive voice to improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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