Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.
Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is undeniable that increase in health problems become a pensive concern in this modern world. In this regard, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. I think, it is an positive approach however there are also some negative effects, both will be outlined in forthcoming fragments with a logical conclusion.
To commence with there are several benefits of using alternative methods. The prime one is, the rise in popularity of alternative medicine is the lack of scientific evidence and regulations.To elaborate it, Unlike conventional medicine, which undergoes rigorous testing and approval processes, many alternative treatments are not subject to the same level of scrutiny. As a result, individuals may be exposed to ineffective or even harmful treatments. For example, some herbal remedies can interact dangerously with prescription medications, leading to serious health complications. Furthermore, the reliance on alternative medicine can lead to delays in receiving appropriate medical care, exacerbating health issues that could have been treated effectively by a qualified doctor and proper medication.
Moreover, the use of alternative medicines can result in delays in receiving proper medical care. In some cases, patients choose to forego or delay necessary medical treatments in favor of alternative options, which can result in the progression of their illness or condition. This can lead to complications, higher medical costs, and even death in severe cases. An example of the negative impact of relying solely on alternative medicines is the case of Steve Jobs, the co-founder of Apple Inc. Jobs was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He initially chose to rely on alternative medicine and delayed conventional medical treatment. By the time he eventually sought medical intervention, it was too late.
To conclude, there are several reasons in favor of visiting their usual doctor such as alternative medicines has lack of scientific evidence and regulations, ineffective and harmful treatments, yet according to a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt but fails to maintain a clear position. While the introduction mentions that the trend is a 'positive approach', the body paragraphs focus exclusively on the dangers and negative consequences of alternative medicine. This creates a significant contradiction between your stated position and the evidence provided. To improve, ensure that your arguments align with your thesis. You provided a relevant example (Steve Jobs), which is a strength, but the overall development is unbalanced because you did not provide any arguments supporting the 'positive' side of the development as you initially claimed you would.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is hindered by the contradiction between the introduction and the body. You use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with' and 'Moreover', but these are sometimes used mechanically. The conclusion is particularly problematic; it summarizes the negative points but then ends with a fragment that does not clearly restate your position or synthesize the arguments. To improve, ensure that each paragraph follows a clear topic sentence and that your conclusion logically follows from the points discussed in the body paragraphs.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
You have an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'rigorous testing', 'exacerbating', and 'medical intervention'. However, there are some word choice errors, such as 'pensive concern' (pensive means thoughtful/dreamy, not serious) and 'forthcoming fragments' (which sounds unnatural in this context). You also repeat the phrase 'alternative medicines and treatments' multiple times. To reach a higher band, try to use more precise synonyms and avoid repeating the same phrases throughout the essay. Focus on using collocations more naturally.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'It is undeniable that increase in health problems become a pensive concern' lacks an article ('an increase') and has subject-verb agreement issues. There are also punctuation errors, such as missing spaces after periods (e.g., 'regulations.To elaborate it'). While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on proofreading for basic articles, verb agreement, and punctuation.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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