Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

There has been a significant rise in the number of unhealthy people with trying subtitute medications rather than taking appointments of their doctor. In my opinion this is a negative approach since a minor health problem might be treated with subtitutes but it can cause medical emergencies and serious health issues leading to death which is very harmful and risky.

Trying to use medicines and other treatments according to one own's knowledge can be harmful leading to medical emergency. For example, an ill person with a headache takes a strong dose of an alternative medicine that reacts with his body leading to medical emergency. Not only this, people can not diagnose the problem correctly that can lead to serious health issues or death. Suppose a person feel numb like earlier and takes the wrong medicine, he might face paralysis attack or heart attack and might even die due to the intake of a wrong medicine. He could have been saved if he would have visited the doctor for a better diagnose.

On the other hand, people who are ill, are well aware about their conditions since they have gone through such situations more often. So in this case they can save both time and money by relying on subtitutes instead of going to the doctor. For example, blood pressure and diabetes are common in Pakistan and people do not take them seriously. An old man might feel low and take diabetes medicine since he know his diabetes level has dropped and a particular medicine can help him bring stability in it.

The growing usage of other medications and medical treatments to avoid going to a doctor can be harmful leading to serious medical issues and deaths while a minor medical problem can be resolved with alternatives. For me, it will remain risky and a negative approach towards a medical problem.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the trend is negative. The ideas are relevant, particularly the risks of misdiagnosis and the potential for medical emergencies. However, the development is somewhat uneven. The second body paragraph attempts to present a counter-argument regarding time and cost savings, but it lacks sufficient depth and is slightly contradictory to the overall stance. While the main position is maintained, the supporting arguments could be more thoroughly explored with more nuanced examples to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main point, ensuring the task is fully addressed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. The progression of ideas is generally easy to follow. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'For example' and 'leading to'. Referencing is occasionally slightly unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between the hypothetical headache scenario and the paralysis example feels abrupt. Despite these minor issues, the paragraphing is appropriate, and the overall structure supports the development of the argument well.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing the writer to convey their meaning clearly. There is an attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'diagnose', 'stability', and 'medical emergencies'. However, there are recurring errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'subtitute' (substitute) and 'one own's' (one's own). The range is somewhat limited, and there is a lack of more sophisticated or precise collocations that would elevate the response. While the errors do not impede communication, they prevent the response from reaching a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors throughout, such as 'people can not diagnose the problem correctly that can lead to' (which can lead to) and 'he know his diabetes level' (he knows). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some awkward phrasings, such as 'people with trying subtitute medications'. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of errors in subject-verb agreement and sentence construction indicates a need for more careful proofreading and a wider range of error-free complex structures.

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