Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In today's globalized world, the proliferation of technology increases the usage of internet throughout the world. The main challenges occur due to the frequent usage of internet are health issues as it affects the eye sight, and mental health and another issue is that it spreads the misinformation and increases the cybercrime. To tackle these issues a pragmatic approach should take to strike a balance between the advantages and disadvantages of the widespread use of internet.

Although, the internet brings numerous advantages as it helps to get information about any topic easily and it is cost-effective, it has numerous disadvantages. Firstly, the excessive use of internet creates mental as well as physical health issues. For instance, young generation spends prolong time infront of screen which effects his eye sight and due to excessive exposure for hours on internet adolsents don't take proper sleep and their sleep cycle disturbs. Consequently, it causes mental issues. Secondly, there are a lot of fake news and fraud on internet, and the news spread with in a few minutes in all over the world, which is detrimental for the society. Lastly, i feel due to the excessive usage of internet people have become less social in real life. For example, in a recent era commonly individuals talk with each other on online apps like whatsap, snap chat and they avoid to nevogiate physically.

To reduced these problems, a multi-faceted approach is needed. Firstly, the individuals should get awareness sessions about the positive usage of internet and about the side effects of the over usage of internet. Secondly, the parents should set scarcity time to spend on computers, as it will be beneficial for their health as well as their education. For instance, when parents strain their children to participate in physical activities, they will definetaly use internet less. acaonsequently, it will strike a balance between the usage of pros and cons of internet.

In conclusion, while internet is offering various benefits, its drawbacks outweight the advantages. As it affects the mental as well as physical health of individual which is detrimental for the societry. The government should organize the awareness sessiins about the benefits and drawbacks of internet. Therefore individuals will be able to undeerstand the positive usage of internet and the problem will reduce.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The candidate has failed to address the actual prompt provided in the task instructions. The prompt asks about alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting a usual doctor, whereas the entire essay discusses the advantages and disadvantages of the widespread use of the internet. Because the student has written a complete essay on an entirely different topic, the response is considered off-topic. While the ideas related to the internet are supported with explanations and examples, the failure to address the core question means the task is not answered appropriately. Therefore, the task response descriptor for off-topic or misread prompts must be applied, resulting in a low score for this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

Despite the severe off-topic nature of the content, the essay maintains a discernible overall structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The writer attempts to sequence ideas logically using transitional markers such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'In conclusion'. However, paragraphing is somewhat erratic, and referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in phrases like 'another issue is that it spreads the misinformation'. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or overused. While the logical progression is hindered by the irrelevance of the subject matter, the structural framework of an essay is present, warranting a score in the mid-range for organisational attempt.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The lexical resource displays a mix of common and some less common vocabulary, though there are numerous instances of inappropriate word choice, spelling errors, and awkward collocations. Examples of lexical errors include 'prolong time', 'infront', 'adolsents', 'sleep cycle disturbs', 'whatsap', 'snap chat', 'nevogiate physically', 'scarcity time', 'acaonsequently', and 'sessiins'. While the candidate attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary related to technology and health, the high frequency of lexical inaccuracies and spelling mistakes noticeably impacts the precision and flow of the writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical accuracy is quite weak. Frequent errors are present throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('the proliferation of technology increases', 'news spread with in a few minutes'), preposition errors, and awkward phrasing ('a pragmatic approach should take', 'when parents strain their children'). Punctuation is also problematic in places, with misplaced commas and run-on sentences. These recurring errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader and restrict the grammatical range and control to a lower band level.

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