Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.
Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The issue of visiting their usual doctor for proper check up become a widely discussed subject in today's world. While some people hold the opinion that trying alternative mdicines and treatments bring numerous advantages. Others, argue that it has certain drawbacks that cannot be overlooked. This essay will discuss both positive and negative development and provide a logical conclusion.
To begin with, there are several resons why many individuals support the alternative madicines and treatments. Firsly, it plays a significant role in improving economy and lifestyles by providing chances to save money. For instance, according to BBC news, people nowadays are saving money for the future generations by not consuming money. Secondly, it contributes in overall progress and development of nations by encouraging individuals to self dependent.Hence, this side argues that it has positive impact on personel as well as economic growth.
On the other hand, critics believe that it has negative impacts. It may create kidney problems and other complications for the health. Moreover, it creates heart issues beacuse high doses can increase blood pressure. For example, according to ARY news, most of the heart patients are presents in the hospitals who used madicines without the discription of doctors. Therefore, it necessary to handle this issue with proper control and responsiblity.
In conclusion, the debate surrounding this topic likely to continue as both sides have strong arguments. However, after analyzing both views it can be clearly see that this is negative development, and offer disadvantages. Therefore, governments and individuals should work to gether for giving awareness about visisting their usual doctors for checkup.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You address the question by presenting reasons in favour of alternative treatments, then explaining health risks, and you ultimately state that this is a negative development. However, the position is not clear at the start: the introduction promises to discuss both sides without indicating your own view, and the conclusion’s judgement arrives only after the discussion. Several supporting ideas are limited or unclear. For example, the claim that alternative treatments help people save money is followed by an example about “saving money for the future generations,” which does not clearly show how treatment choices produce this benefit. The health risks are more relevant, but the claims about kidney and heart problems need explanation or reliable, specific support. State your position clearly in the introduction and develop fewer points with clearer reasoning.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two sides, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the broad structure. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, and links between claims and examples are not always clear. The BBC example about saving money does not convincingly support the preceding point, while “Therefore” introduces a recommendation without fully showing how it follows from the risks described. Some references are also vague, such as “this side” and “it.” To improve, make each paragraph follow a clear claim–explanation–example sequence and use linking phrases only when the relationship between ideas is precise.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “alternative medicines and treatments,” “complications,” “blood pressure,” and “awareness,” so the reader can generally understand the subject. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision. Examples include “improving economy and lifestyles,” “self dependent,” and “proper control and responsiblity”; these expressions are either unnatural or unclear in context. Misspellings such as “mdicines,” “resons,” “beacuse,” and “visisting” are noticeable, and “discription” appears to be intended as “prescription.” Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing medical care and health risks, and check spelling carefully. Prefer precise wording over broad claims about “overall progress and development.”
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast structure beginning “While some people hold the opinion…” and a concluding sentence with “However.” Nevertheless, errors occur frequently, and some sentence patterns are faulty or incomplete. For example, “The issue … become” needs subject–verb agreement and a suitable verb form; “While some people hold the opinion…” is left without a complete contrasting main clause; and “it can be clearly see” has an incorrect verb form. Other examples include “it necessary to handle” and “this topic likely to continue,” both of which omit a required verb. Practise complete clause structures, agreement, and verb forms, then proofread each sentence for missing words and punctuation.
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