Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many individuals with healts issues are taking different kinds of medications and treatments rather than going to their doctors at present. I firmly suggest this a complete negetive development. It can lead to more disturbance instead of relaxation. The number of health diseases are increasing in today's world and if one try to cure them on his own, it is not a great idea.

Firstly, i would say that human boilogy is complex and only a professional doctor is able to deal with it. Only a health specialist is fully capable to diagnose the threat inside the human body. So, everyone must see his doctor.

Secondly, only a pharmacist is allowed to prescribe the medicines and if any person tries to take tablets on his own, it can cause harm to him. In worst cases, there is a risk of death. Hence, it is not a positive impact.

Additionally, in my experience, one of my friends was ill. He had severe fever. He thought that it was a common fever and he just granted it. After a few days, he was hospitalized and the doctors told us that he was suffering from malaria. They asserted that if we were late, he had been dead. Therefore, it is very crucial to take advice from your doctors rather than becoming your own.

In conclusion, i would say that proper appointments with your health speacialists and check up is very essential for every individual. One can only take a guess of the disease but cannot diagnose it properly. This may lead to certain consequences. if you listen to your doctor then everything will be supercalifragilisticexpialiducious.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the opening: you consider self-treatment instead of consulting a doctor a negative development, and you maintain this view in the conclusion. You give relevant reasons, including the risks of taking medicine without professional advice, and the malaria anecdote provides a concrete example. This addresses the task, but some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, “only a pharmacist is allowed to prescribe” is not reliably accurate and does not clearly distinguish pharmacists from doctors; explain more precisely why professional diagnosis and treatment matter. The friend’s story supports your argument, but you could connect it more explicitly to the wider consequences of delaying care. Develop each reason with clearer explanation and a more dependable example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction states your view, body paragraphs present reasons and an example, and a conclusion restates your position. Sequencing phrases such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” “Additionally,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the main points. However, the progression can feel mechanical because each paragraph is introduced by a formulaic connector, and some links between ideas are abrupt. The shift from the general claim about doctors to the pharmacist point, for example, needs a clearer explanation of how the ideas relate. The final sentence about listening to a doctor and “everything” being fine also sits awkwardly after the conclusion’s more measured point. Use transitions that show the specific relationship between claims, and make the ending reinforce rather than introduce a new, exaggerated idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “diagnose,” “health specialist,” “medicines,” “hospitalized,” and “consequences,” so the reader can understand your main argument. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision. “Taking different kinds of medications” does not accurately express the task’s focus on alternative treatments, while “granted it” is unclear in the fever anecdote. There are also misspellings such as “healts,” “negetive,” “boilogy,” and “speacialists.” The playful, very long word at the end is inappropriate for this formal essay. Build a more precise set of health-related expressions, check spelling carefully, and choose formal wording that fits the argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if any person tries to take tablets on his own, it can cause harm” and a relative clause in “a professional doctor is able to deal with it.” These attempts help communicate your reasoning, but some grammatical errors remain. Examples include “The number of health diseases are increasing,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “if one try,” which needs a matching verb form. Capitalisation is inconsistent in “i,” and the final conditional sentence needs clearer punctuation and structure. Some phrasing also makes relationships between clauses difficult to follow. Review subject–verb agreement, pronoun consistency, and sentence boundaries, then proofread for capital letters and punctuation.

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