Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

These days, a increasing number of individuals with health odds are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. I think this is a positive development. In this essay I will explain some key points and give exaples from my own experience. On one hand, I believe people has right to choose doctors or medicines from their own experience. Sometimes, some doctors provide useless medicines to their patients just for making some money, and I think that must be a big reason why individuals moveing to alternative medicines or treatments. For examples, I remember I was ill about one month ago, and went to the my usual doctor. He gave me some useless medicines after checking me that didn't even cure my disease properly. Moreover, that's why nowadays people are changing their mind towards alternative treatments. I think our usual doctors first maintain a trust and then started provide us useless medicines. On the other hand, pateints shouldn't choose one doctor for their treatments isntad they give a chance to others. However, these days, doctors are also providing medicines that they made their own just for making lots of money. For instance, tha medicines componies may give them money to suggest their medicines so they can make money or sell their products worldwide. Neverthenless, personally I believe this would be a good improvement in our counrty if people will just stay on alternative medicines. In conclusion, doctors should treat their all patenits in right ways instead of just assemble from them. The government also should take some actions and check every medicines time to time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you consider the move towards alternative treatment positive, and you give a personal example of receiving medicine that you felt was ineffective. You also identify a possible financial motive behind some doctors’ recommendations and call for government checks. However, the response only partly develops the task. The personal anecdote is relevant, but it does not explain why alternative treatment would be safer or more effective, and the claim that people should “just stay on alternative medicines” is not supported or qualified. The discussion also shifts between choosing another doctor and choosing alternative medicine. To strengthen the response, explain the benefits you see in alternative treatments and acknowledge risks, such as delaying necessary medical care.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an introduction, a body discussion and a conclusion, and phrases such as “On one hand,” “Moreover” and “In conclusion” signal some relationships between ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because the two sides are not clearly organised: “On the other hand” introduces points that largely repeat the criticism of doctors rather than presenting a distinct counterpoint. Several links are also unclear, including “I think our usual doctors first maintain a trust and then started provide us useless medicines.” The conclusion introduces government action without developing that proposal in the body. Group related points into clear paragraphs, use transitions to show whether you are adding, contrasting or concluding, and make references such as “that” explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the general subject, including “alternative medicines,” “treatments,” “patients” and “government.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “financial” motives expressed through “making some money” and medicines companies. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make the meaning less clear, for example “health odds,” “assemble from them” and “stay on alternative medicines.” Spelling errors such as “exaples,” “pateints” and “counrty” are noticeable. Build a more precise vocabulary for discussing healthcare, and check spelling and collocations so your meaning is consistently clear.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including a relative clause in “medicines … that didn't even cure my disease properly” and a conditional idea in the final paragraph. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in agreement, verb forms, articles and sentence construction occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “a increasing number,” “people has right,” “doctors … started provide,” and “if people will just stay.” The sentence beginning “I think our usual doctors…” also has an unclear tense sequence. Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then extend them with subordinate clauses; check subject–verb agreement, verb forms after “to,” and article use when editing.

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