Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

A large number of people are trying alternative medicines and treatments for their health problems instead of visiting professional doctors. In my view this is a negative development because health problem may get worse without a proper treatment.

In many countries medical treatment may very expensive. It can be difficult for lower income persons to afford the medical services. For that reason people may try alternative ways for an affordable treatment. Most people may take advice from nearby medicine store for their healthcare problems. The salesmen of this stores may not have proper qualification .As a result, it can have an negative impact on their health by consuming the medicines prescribed by the salesperson of a medicine store.

Healthcare is an essential need of a people. However, most people cannot afford this. Government can make healthcare affordable for this people. As a result everyone in a country can experience the benefits of better medical facilities.

In my opinion ,People with health problems should visit skilled and professional doctors rather than unprofessional person. Without taking proper prescribed medicine their health problems may not solved and got worsen day by day. Government as well as the individual private hospitals can work together to make the medical treatment affordable for everyone. This can led to increase peoples' interest to visit better hospitals where they can be prescribed by professional doctors.

In conclusion, this is a negative development. Although people may unwillingly choose this alternatives instead of visiting skilled doctors. If the medical treatments can be more affordable, people can avoid this alternatives and visit professional doctors for their health problems.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction to the conclusion: you consider the trend negative because people may not receive appropriate care. You also address why people turn to alternatives, linking this to the cost of medical treatment and limited access to qualified advice. These are relevant points, and the suggestion that governments and private hospitals could improve affordability adds a practical response. This meets the task well, but the supporting ideas are not equally developed. For example, the risk of taking advice from medicine-store salespeople is asserted rather than illustrated with a specific consequence or example, and the affordability solution is repeated without much explanation of how it would change behaviour. Develop one or two points with clearer cause-and-effect reasoning to make the argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: it introduces your view, explains cost and access, proposes a solution, and concludes by restating your position. Paragraphs generally have identifiable purposes, and links such as “For that reason,” “As a result,” and “In conclusion” help show relationships between ideas. However, some connections feel mechanical, and the progression between the affordability problem and the risks of alternative treatment could be smoother. The final two paragraphs also repeat the same recommendation to make treatment affordable and visit professional doctors. Referencing is occasionally unclear, as in “this people” and “this alternatives,” which makes the reader pause. Use more varied transitions and ensure pronouns clearly refer to the intended people or treatments.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “alternative medicines,” “medical services,” “healthcare,” “qualified,” and “medical facilities,” so the main ideas are understandable. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “negative development” and “professional doctors.” However, the range is somewhat repetitive: “professional doctors,” “health problems,” and “affordable” recur several times, while some combinations are unnatural or imprecise, including “nearby medicine store,” “an essential need,” and “got worsen.” These choices sometimes make the writing less fluent, even though the intended meaning is usually clear. Build a wider set of accurate collocations for healthcare access and treatment, and check whether each word fits its grammatical and contextual role.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and some more complex forms, including the conditional “If the medical treatments can be more affordable” and the subordinate clause “Although people may unwillingly choose this alternatives.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main message remains clear. However, some errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries persist. Examples include “health problem may get worse,” “an negative impact,” “this stores,” and “their health problems may not solved.” The final “Although” clause is also left without a complete main clause. Review subject–verb agreement and article use, and make sure subordinate clauses are attached to complete sentences. More accurate control of these patterns would make your argument easier to read.

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