Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this modern era peoples uses medicines by themself, rather than taking advice from doctors.This is a major raising problem now a day which might lead to serious health issues. According to my point of view it is negative development. As the excessive use of medicines cause body anti-restance to antibiotics.

The use of additative without the advice of doctor and making treatments by your ownself causes various health problem. Firstly the many medicine has negative impact aslo, such as many people uses iron, vatimans and other nutrient by their own self without having any medical reports or lab tests, which lead to malnutriton. Secondly many peoples, if they feel little bit fiver they start taking medicine by themself even antibiotic, which made our body anti-restance to various medicines. So if we feel high fever or serious injury many antibiotic does not work completly. Futhermore, if a paragnet women take medicine and start treatments by themself cause serious health issues to new borns baby as we see a lot cases in our society.

Futhermore, the uses of drugs(medicines) might cause variuos dieases such as heart failure, kidney failure, depression ,headche and could lead many problems. As due to which majority of people are facing the problem of depression ,heart failure and kidney failure.

In conclusion, i would like to say that taking medicine without the advice of doctor can never be positive devlopment.It could lead to various health problem in our later ages. I would also says that goverments should have proper consuling to these peoples and government should provide free survices for medical checkup of people should not be worried about finical issues.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you consider self-treatment instead of consulting a doctor to be negative, and the conclusion restates this view. You give relevant reasons, including inappropriate use of supplements, antibiotic resistance, and risks to pregnant women and babies. These examples show that you address the question and support your opinion. However, some points are asserted rather than explained: for instance, the link between taking iron or vitamins without tests and “malnutrition” is unclear, and the list of illnesses in the later paragraph is not supported with a specific explanation. Develop fewer points more fully, and clarify how each example demonstrates the harm of choosing alternative treatment over a doctor’s advice.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs, and a conclusion, and the ideas generally follow a sensible order. Linking expressions such as “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the argument. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or unclear. “Furthermore” begins two consecutive paragraphs, while the relationship between the claims about supplements, malnutrition, and later health problems is not made explicit. Some references are also vague, as in “due to which majority of people are facing the problem,” where the cause is difficult to identify. Use a wider range of natural transitions and make links between claims explicit; grouping related examples into clearer paragraphs would also improve progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to health and medicine, including “antibiotic resistance,” “medical reports,” “kidney failure,” and “serious health issues.” These choices help communicate the topic, but frequent spelling errors and inaccurate word forms make the vocabulary less reliable and sometimes slow the reader: examples include “anti-restance,” “additative,” “vatimans,” “paragnet,” and “devlopment.” Some phrases are also imprecise or unnatural, such as “making treatments by your ownself” and “little bit fiver.” Aim to learn accurate spelling and collocations as complete phrases, and choose precise terms rather than repeating broad expressions such as “various health problem.” This would make your meaning clearer and more appropriate for an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple statements and some longer sentences with clauses, for example the sentence beginning “Firstly the many medicine has negative impact.” This shows an attempt to vary sentence structure, and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, errors in agreement, articles, plurals, and verb forms occur in several places: “peoples uses,” “many medicine has,” and “many antibiotic does not work” need different grammatical forms. Some sentences also become difficult to follow because clauses are joined without clear punctuation, as in the sentence about pregnant women taking medicine. Practise checking subject–verb agreement and singular/plural forms, and break long sentences into clearer units. More accurate control of these patterns would make your argument easier to read.

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