Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

In recent days, an increase number of population with health issues are trying alternative medications and treatments rather than consulting their usual doctor. This essay will discuss why i believe this development has negative consequences, as it can lead to medical emergencies and contribute to health risks.

One main reason is major medical emergencies can be caused by unprofessional advice and improper treatment as not having proper medical education and taking medication without doctors advice can be risky. For example,

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You state a clear position: you believe the trend is negative, and you identify possible medical emergencies and health risks as reasons. However, the response addresses the task only minimally because it stops before explaining either reason or giving a relevant example. The sentence beginning “One main reason” introduces a point about unprofessional advice, but the example is left unfinished after “For example,” and there is no discussion of why people choose alternative treatments or how these choices affect health. The response is also 170 words below the required minimum, leaving the argument substantially incomplete. Develop each reason with explanation and a specific example, then conclude by restating your judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic overall direction: the opening introduces the issue and your negative position, followed by an attempt to begin a supporting paragraph. The phrase “One main reason” signals the next idea, and “For example” shows an intention to support it. However, the response ends at that point, so there is no completed example, further progression, or conclusion. The opening’s promise that the essay “will discuss” consequences is not fulfilled, and the relationship between “medical emergencies” and “health risks” is not clarified. To improve organisation, use separate paragraphs for distinct reasons, develop each through explanation and evidence, and finish with a conclusion. Use linking phrases to show how each point supports your overall view.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “alternative medications and treatments,” “health issues,” “medical emergencies,” and “medical education.” These choices make the subject clear and show an attempt to discuss healthcare rather than relying entirely on general language. However, the short response offers little range or flexibility, and several expressions are awkward or imprecise: “an increase number of population” and “usual doctor” do not sound natural in this context. “Improper treatment” is relevant but remains general without a more precise description. Build a wider set of accurate collocations for discussing healthcare, such as self-medication, qualified medical advice, and adverse effects, and check that word forms and combinations sound natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response includes a few different sentence patterns, including a complex opening with “rather than” and a reason clause introduced by “as.” The main message is generally understandable, and the first sentence attempts to present the topic and your position together. However, control is uneven: “an increase number … are trying” has problems with article, word form, and subject–verb agreement, while “i believe” needs a capital letter. In “taking medication without doctors advice,” the possessive form is missing, and the long sentence beginning “One main reason” is difficult to follow because its clauses are not clearly structured. Practise accurate agreement and possessives, and divide complex ideas into controlled sentences with clear punctuation.

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