Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In current days, a increasing number of indivual with health issues are trying alternative drugs and treatments instead of going their usual doctor.

I totally disagree with this statment people should be visit their doctor before they take their drugs so i give opinion.

Firstly, people should go to the doctor first before they take any type of medicines due to that this is a huge issues and know a days people have a big problems with their health.

Secondlly, they should visit any hospital which near to them then tell to the doctor about their health issues that is amazing way.

Therefore, do not take any types of medicine which you not understand this is a negative effect on your body.

Thirdlly, take a bad treatments also have negative effect on your health there is alot of people who go to the wrong doctors and they give them effecting drugs so this is a serious issues in every state people should goo to the claver doctor who understand your health and gives you a non effective suppliments do not use unhealthy products like cold drinks burgers and street food its effect you very badly. However, before take any types of medicine visit the sutibale doctor and do not play with your health alwayes choose good one beacuse its your life don`t compromise with your life good health more life.

Inconclusion, people must be go to the dooctors first then use sppliments which doctor prefer you beacuse it`s have negative effect.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

Your position is identifiable: you oppose replacing a usual doctor with alternative treatments, and you repeatedly advise readers to consult a doctor first. This is relevant to the question, but the response addresses the issue only minimally. The main reasons—unknown medicines may harm the body and some practitioners may prescribe harmful drugs—are asserted rather than explained or supported with a specific example. The discussion also shifts to cold drinks, burgers and street food, which does not clearly support the comparison between alternative treatment and visiting a usual doctor. Clarify whether you oppose all alternative treatments or only using them without medical advice, then develop two directly relevant reasons with explanation or an example. A more precise position would make the response more convincing and complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a basic paragraph structure, and sequencing words such as “Firstly,” “Secondlly,” “Thirdlly” and “Inconclusion” show an attempt to organise the points. However, progression is difficult to follow because the body paragraphs do not develop distinct, connected arguments. For example, the paragraph beginning “Thirdlly” moves from harmful treatments to doctors, supplements, unhealthy food and a general statement about life. Several sentences run together, while references such as “this” and “they” do not always make the intended connection clear. Use one paragraph for each main reason, explain each point in a logical order, and use linking phrases to show cause and result rather than relying mainly on numbered transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “health issues,” “treatments,” “doctor,” “drugs” and “supplements,” so the general subject is usually recognisable. However, the range is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to read. Examples include “indivual,” “statment,” “alot,” “claver” and “sutibale.” Some expressions are also unclear or unnatural, such as “effecting drugs,” “non effective suppliments” and “good health more life.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and avoid repeating broad terms such as “issues” and “negative effect.” Learning phrases such as “seek medical advice” and “potential side effects” would help you express your ideas more precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt a few longer sentences and use basic connectors, but most sentence patterns are simple, and errors are frequent enough to obscure meaning in places. For example, “people should be visit their doctor” has an incorrect verb form, while “before they take their drugs” needs clearer sentence structure in context. Agreement and articles are also problematic in “a increasing number” and “this is a huge issues.” Several sentences join multiple ideas without appropriate punctuation, particularly the long sentence beginning “Thirdlly, take a bad treatments.” Practise forming accurate subject–verb sentences, using infinitives and modal verbs correctly, and separating complete ideas with full stops. More reliable control of these basics should come before attempting longer structures.

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