Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

According to my point of view, all people have different kinds of health problem. They do not know that what happened to them. They don't know that what they could do at that time. people uses alternative medicines instead of visiting doctors. And this causes a bigger problem for them. These medicines create side effect in them. In this case they suffer from more diseases then after all these problems they visit the doctor. then doctor could not do anything for their early recovery. because their diseases are now in very serious conditions. After that people starts to blame the doctor. First of all they should used the periscribed medicines or visit their family doctor for their treatment. otherwise they have their own responsibility about their health. these cases are mostly due to lack of madical faccilities in hospitals or in countryside areas. They are lacked by a proper doctor and they visit their local doctors. And these doctors smetimes periscribed them with wrong medicines. and these medicines become very dangrous for their health. All of this negative developement because all of this is very ingerious to patient health. goverenment should work for the countryside people so they could get better medical opportunities and try to make a better way of life. goverenment should make sure for the camp of specialized doctors in contruside areas every month so they could remain healthy and wealthy. some people do not beleive on doctors and in this way they make themselves unhealthy and deseased. goverement should informed these people with better information

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is clear: you regard replacing a usual doctor with alternative medicines as a negative development. You give relevant reasons, including possible side effects, delayed treatment and the risks of relying on local practitioners, and you suggest improving medical access in rural areas. These points address the question, but they are mostly asserted rather than explained or supported with a specific example. The response also shifts between alternative medicine and treatment by local doctors without clarifying how these are related. To strengthen the argument, explain one or two consequences in more detail and include a relevant example, while keeping the focus on whether choosing alternatives instead of a usual doctor is positive or negative.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response contains a recognisable line of argument: it describes risks, then recommends better access to doctors and public information. However, ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and the progression is difficult to follow. Many sentences begin with repeated connectors such as “And,” “then,” “because” and “After that,” while “First of all” does not lead into a clearly structured sequence. The final suggestions about government camps and informing people could be separated from the explanation of medical risks. Use an introduction, one paragraph for the main reasons, and a conclusion; connect each point with clear references and transitions rather than relying on repeated linking words.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “alternative medicines,” “side effect,” “family doctor,” “specialized doctors” and “medical opportunities,” so the reader can identify the subject and your main concerns. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate or misspelled forms make the writing less clear, such as “periscribed,” “facillities,” “dangrous” and “ingerious.” Some expressions are also imprecise or unnatural, including “diseases are now in very serious conditions” and “remain healthy and wealthy.” Aim for accurate spelling and more natural collocations, such as describing a condition as “serious” or treatment as “delayed.” Vary repeated general words such as “people,” “problem” and “medicines” where appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Most sentences use simple structures, and the reader can generally understand the intended meaning. There are attempts to link clauses, for example, “These medicines create side effect in them” and “because their diseases are now in very serious conditions,” but control is inconsistent. Errors occur in verb forms and agreement (“people uses,” “people starts,” “they should used”), sentence boundaries and capitalization (“then doctor,” “because”), and clause construction (“They do not know that what happened to them”). These frequent problems sometimes make relationships between ideas unclear. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and verb patterns, and build longer sentences from correctly joined clauses, checking punctuation and capitalization at each sentence boundary.

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