Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It is often argued that Today, a growing number of individuals with health problems are trying opposite medecines and treatments istead of visiting their doctors for checkup and to learn about their disease. I often agree with this notation.

on the one hand , many individuals nowadays use medecines for which they have no information and they also didn't know about the side effects of the certain medecine they are using. For instance, in Pakistan , many individuals usually use a medecine namely

"Panadol" for the cure of headache instead of visiting their doctor. Morever, use of unsual medecine without any research and knowledge using alternative medecine can cause many health problems.

on the other hand

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

You identify the topic and give a relevant example: people in Pakistan taking Panadol for headaches rather than consulting a doctor. However, your position is unclear. “I often agree with this notation” does not clearly say whether you consider the trend positive or negative, and the response ends at “on the other hand” without completing the opposing point or giving a conclusion. The discussion therefore addresses the question only partially, and the ideas about side effects and risks from using medicines without research are asserted rather than explained or supported. The response is also 134 words below the required minimum, leaving too little space to develop your reasons. State your view directly, explain the consequences, and complete the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: you introduce the issue, use “on the one hand” to begin a supporting point, and provide an example. This gives the reader some sense of direction. However, the progression is incomplete because “on the other hand” is left without a following idea, and there is no concluding paragraph to bring the argument together. The linking phrases also suggest a contrast that is never developed. Several ideas are crowded into one paragraph, while spacing and punctuation around transitions are inconsistent. Use separate paragraphs for your position, each main reason, and the conclusion; then make sure every transition introduces a complete, logically connected point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “side effects,” “alternative medicine,” “health problems,” and “research,” and the example of Panadol makes the subject clear. However, the range is limited and several spelling or word-choice errors make parts of the response less clear, such as “opposite medecines,” “notation,” and “unsual medecine.” Repetition of “individuals,” “medecine,” and “use” also limits precision. Choose standard, accurate terms and vary how you refer to people and treatments. For example, “alternative treatments” is clearer than “opposite medicines,” while “view” or “position” would express your opinion more naturally than “notation.” Proofreading spelling would also make your meaning easier to follow.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and a longer sentence explaining that people may not know about a medicine’s side effects. This shows some effort to connect ideas, and the main meaning is generally recoverable. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors in sentence formation and punctuation recur. The opening has awkward construction (“It is often argued that Today…”), and the sentence beginning “Morever, use of…” lacks a clear, well-formed structure. Capitalisation and spacing around sentence beginnings and transitions are also inconsistent. Practise writing complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and use a few controlled complex forms, such as “Although some people choose alternative treatments, they may not understand the risks.”

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