Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays,majority of the people experiencing a with health problems they are chossing different medicines and treatments instead of consultating a qualified doctor has become a serious concern in many societies.

In my view I strongly believe it is an negative trend I will discuss reasons for these cause and provide an example.

One major cause of this problem is that the lifestyle of human beings had changed a lot,eating patterns ,and lack of physical activities,spending amount of time with mobile gadgets in social media.As a result,this habits leads to growth of health issues.Another contribution factor is consuming unknown medicines and following online remedies which may lead to poorer health in the long run.

To address these issues,several actions can taken,firstly , Don't much depends or influenced to online antidote avoid unhealthy life patterns in order to reduce ossues it is necessary to participate in physical activities in both times in a day.

Secondly, individuals can also consultaning a qualified physician with out doctor ' treatment or prescripted medicine it may also keads to death of a person.So it is a negative trend taking own treatment or medicines.If these measures are implemented efficiently,yhe situation would be improve considerably.

For instance,The teenagers in Auckland are taking self medicines, although they are gathering the information from google and purchasing medicines with out meeting a doctor's.Morever, majority of the young are in experiencing the side effects of tablets and felling unwell in their lives.

In conclusion,this issue mainly stems from online and social media.However,it can still be tackled through suitable actions taken by both governments and individuals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you consider replacing a doctor’s advice with self-treatment a negative development, and you give relevant reasons, including the risks of unknown medicines and online remedies. The Auckland example also supports your concern about side effects. This addresses the main question, but some ideas are not fully developed or are only loosely connected to it. The paragraph about lifestyle changes explains why health problems may increase, rather than directly showing why alternative treatment instead of a doctor is harmful. Your proposed actions are also unclear in places, so the reader cannot always tell what you recommend. To strengthen the response, explain the risks of delaying diagnosis or taking unsuitable remedies, and develop one example with a clear cause-and-effect link.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a statement of your view, supporting paragraphs, an example and a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “As a result,” “For instance” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the discussion. However, progression is sometimes difficult to follow because paragraphs combine different purposes: the section beginning “To address these issues” moves between advice, risks and a conclusion about the trend. Some connections are also unclear, particularly between lifestyle changes and choosing alternative treatment. Use each paragraph for one main function, and make the relationship between its sentences explicit. Clearer referencing and more precise transitions would make the argument easier to follow without relying so heavily on formulaic signposts.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “qualified doctor,” “online remedies,” “physical activities” and “side effects,” which helps communicate the subject. However, the range is limited and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make parts of the response difficult to understand. For example, “online antidote” does not clearly express the intended idea, and “Don't much depends or influenced to online” is hard to interpret. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, such as “chossing,” “consultaning” and “prescripted.” Aim to learn common health-related collocations and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise expressions for self-medication, medical advice and adverse effects would help you explain your ideas clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a cause-and-effect structure with “As a result” and a conditional sentence beginning “If these measures are implemented.” However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles and verb forms sometimes make meaning difficult to follow. The opening sentence, “Nowadays, majority of the people … they are chossing … has become,” contains competing subjects and does not form a clear grammatical sentence. Other examples include “this habits leads” and “the situation would be improve.” Work on building complete sentences with one clear subject and verb, and check agreement, articles and verb forms. Breaking the longer, unclear sentences into shorter units would also improve accuracy.

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