Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

These days an incresing number of people take advise from family doctor. In that time, a growing number of individual with health releted issues are trying take different medicines and treatments instead of visiting their doctor. In my perception, this is partly to a large extend. My preference is justified in upcoming paragraphs with valid reasons and examples.

Certain people take suggestion different types of doctor. Firstly, they keep advice from friends and family member. After that health problem convert to much pain. Then they are discussed pain by doctor. Moreover, they not stable for same doctor. After week they change doctor. However they can not see change on that pain. For example, one day i have to much pain in stomach. Some people say that type of medicine try, although i do not have try. in addtion i take advice from doctor after he said do not take medicine for that pain.

Furthermore, some people do not take care for theirselves. When they go in hotal, eat fast food and heavy food. they should follow diet so they can make good health. Moreover they can take care of their physical and mental health because after they do work fully enrgetly and fit their body. For example, in my schools staff they keep lecture for only exercise. Therefore student can take care their body and healthy.

In conclusion, we should take advice from only one doctor and after we check result. Do not change doctor on week. We wait for one month and if not well, we can change doctor.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response touches on health choices and gives a personal example, but it does not clearly answer whether using alternative medicines instead of a usual doctor is a positive or negative development. The opening says, “In my perception, this is partly to a large extend,” which leaves the position unclear, and the conclusion shifts to advice about staying with one doctor rather than evaluating alternative treatments. The stomach-pain example suggests that following a doctor’s advice can be safer, but the link to alternative medicine is not explained. The discussion of diet, exercise and school lectures is largely tangential to the question. State a clear positive or negative view, then develop relevant reasons and examples that directly compare alternative treatment with medical care.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response into an introduction, body paragraphs and a conclusion, and linking expressions such as “Firstly,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” show awareness of sequencing. However, the ideas are not arranged coherently enough to build a clear argument. The first body paragraph moves from advice from family and friends to changing doctors and then to a personal stomach-pain example, without making the relationship between these points clear. The next paragraph shifts to fast food, diet and exercise, which does not support the central issue. Some references, such as “they” and “that pain,” are also unclear. Organise each paragraph around one relevant reason and explain how it supports your stated position.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses basic vocabulary related to health, including “doctor,” “medicine,” “pain,” “diet” and “physical and mental health,” so the general topic is recognisable. However, the range is repetitive and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make meaning difficult to follow. For example, “take advise from family doctor” and “keep advice from friends” do not express the intended idea naturally, while “health problem convert to much pain” is unclear. There are also spelling errors such as “incresing,” “releted” and “addtion.” Build a more precise set of expressions for discussing treatment choices, such as “seek medical advice,” “alternative remedies” and “potential side effects,” and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

Most sentences rely on short, simple patterns, and attempts to connect clauses with “although,” “because” and “when” show some effort to vary sentence structure. However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes obscure the intended meaning. Examples include “a growing number of individual … are trying take,” “After week they change doctor,” and “they are discussed pain by doctor,” where agreement, verb forms and sentence construction are not controlled. Articles and plurals are also inconsistent, as in “in hotal” and “family member.” Capitalisation and punctuation are unreliable, particularly in “in addtion i take advice.” Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them into longer sentences while checking subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles and sentence boundaries.

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