Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.

Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Increasing numbers of people are experiencing health issues by relying on drugs rather than seeking medical advice.Personally, I believe this development is negative not only for individual health but also for the broader societal impact.I'll examine the pros and cons regarding this matter.

Initially, the number of people suffering from different kinds of health issues such as allergy, cough, and fever are basic health problems faced by everyone in this world.Sometimes taking medicine is an instant cure for this health problem, while sometimes it is hard to visit the doctor, not only due to financial obstacles but also because it is time-consuming.Although developing countries offer health insurance, where underdeveloped countries suffer.Using medications for fundamental health problems yields a quick fix.

Another thing is that an instant medication is not beneficial for your health; it provides a momentary relief but can lead to deeper problems within your body.Medical treatment is crucial for everyone.For instance high fever is very common issue if our body faced any difficulty we must suffer through feverIf we do not visit a doctor and take medicine, it can cause complex health issues, such as typhoid. Cancer patients also suffer from high fever.Furthermore, we do not dismiss our health problems. Regular health checks are essential, with at least one every two months.

In conclusion, visiting a doctor is a mandatory for individuals health.Our body is very sensitive we do take care of our body and treatment should be compulsory for everyone.Every countries goverment should take reposibility for our health insurance .Treatment should be convenient for everyone.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You state a clear overall view that relying on medicines instead of seeing a doctor is negative, and you give relevant reasons, including temporary relief and the risk of more serious health problems. However, the response only partly addresses the task because it shifts from alternative medicines and treatments to taking drugs generally, without explaining what alternative treatments you mean or comparing them with a usual doctor’s care. The point about cost and time is relevant, but it is not developed into a balanced explanation of why people choose these treatments or how the drawbacks outweigh the benefits. The fever and typhoid example is also unclear and does not convincingly support the claim. Keep your position, but explain it with a specific, accurate example and fuller reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposting such as “Initially,” “Another thing” and “In conclusion” helps identify the stages of the essay. However, the ideas do not progress consistently: the first body paragraph moves between common illnesses, access barriers, insurance and quick relief, while the second combines fever, typhoid, cancer and health checks without clear links. Some connections are also difficult to follow, particularly “Although developing countries offer health insurance, where underdeveloped countries suffer.” Use each paragraph to develop one main reason, then explain how its example supports that reason. Clearer referencing and more precise links between sentences would make the organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “health issues,” “financial obstacles,” “momentary relief” and “health insurance,” so the reader can understand the general subject. However, the range is limited and several phrases are inaccurate or awkward, which sometimes makes the intended meaning unclear. For example, “instant medication” and “basic health problems” are imprecise in this context, while “complex health issues” is vague. There are also spelling and word-form errors, such as “goverment” and “reposibility.” Aim for precise terms that distinguish self-medication from alternative treatments, and check common collocations and spelling. This will help express your argument more clearly and naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a contrast with “Although” and a conditional structure beginning “If we do not visit a doctor.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and frequent errors can make the reader pause or infer the intended meaning. Examples include “the number … are,” “where underdeveloped countries suffer,” and “if our body faced any difficulty,” which show problems with agreement, clause structure and verb forms. Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent: “feverIf” runs two ideas together, and several sentences lack spaces after full stops. Practise building shorter, complete sentences first, then check agreement, articles and punctuation before adding subordinate clauses.

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