Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 17 · 2026-10-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor.
Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Some people belive that health problem with people are trying altranative medicine and treatments and visiting their doctor in my prepective it a negative devolopment.
On the one hand altanartive treatment like accupuncture, hurbul medicine can be sork for a little while and it is help to reduce the stress ans give mind relaxation for a while its not give a full fill recovary.at the same time these treatment they use a natural products.
On the other hand using altertative medicine in the modern society will give a veraity of helth problems.However the age catagory is also very importnant for all the medicine what we use.
If someone have serouse line like cancer , heart issue remainding on natural prodect effect their daily medical treatment.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
You state a clear view—“in my perspective it a negative development”—and give relevant reasons, including that alternative treatments may offer temporary stress relief but not full recovery, and that relying on them for cancer or heart problems could affect medical care. However, the response addresses the question only minimally: these points are brief, and the claim that alternative medicine causes “a variety of health problems” is not explained or supported with an example. The comparison with visiting a usual doctor also needs to be made explicit. The response is 125 words, below the required 250, so there is not enough development to fully explain your position. Extend each reason with a clear explanation and a relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
There is a basic attempt to organise the response into an opening, an “On the one hand” paragraph and an “On the other hand” paragraph. This gives the reader some indication that you are considering different aspects before stating a negative view. However, the progression is difficult to follow: the first body paragraph discusses possible benefits, while the second introduces risks without clearly connecting them to your overall position. Several ideas are joined in long, unclear sequences, and the final point about age is not developed. Use separate, focused paragraphs and make the relationship between each reason and your conclusion explicit. Clearer sentence boundaries and linking phrases would help the argument progress logically.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You attempt some topic-related vocabulary, including “alternative medicine,” “acupuncture,” “herbal medicine,” “natural products,” and “cancer.” These choices show awareness of the subject, and the main topic can generally be identified. However, the range is limited and several spelling errors—such as “belive,” “altranative,” “recovary,” and “serouse”—make the response harder to read. Some expressions are also imprecise, for example “a serious line” and “full fill recovery.” Aim to use accurate, natural phrases for medical conditions and treatment outcomes, and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the risks and benefits rather than relying on broad claims.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5
The response attempts a few longer structures, such as “If someone have serious line like cancer, heart issue…” and contrasts introduced by “On the one hand” and “On the other hand.” However, sentence forms are very limited, and frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence boundaries make several ideas difficult to understand. For example, “it a negative development” is missing a verb, “these treatment they use” has unclear structure and agreement, and “If someone have” does not use the correct verb form. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly where sentences run together. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with clauses such as “because” and “although.”
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